Sexuary 2017 - Sensations

Ok, so I know we have talked about sensations in the bedroom before, but that's how we kicked off Sexuary 2017, with Jackie tied to the bed, blindfolded and me adding different sensations to her body.  It's amazing how different textures, different elements and some very simple things can make a difference.

So let me start at the beginning.  We've had Japanese ropes for years (I think we got our first one at Spencers).  If you don't have a pair I highly recommend them.  They are cheap, comfortable and easy to use.  Before that I used my neckties to  tie Jackie up with.  This year I added a couple of d-links to the back of our headboard so I could just snap the rope in and it would hold.  I use to tie a rope to the bedframe and then our Japanese rope to that.  So not much excuse to not do something if you'd like to try other than some prep work.

Second, if you don't have a blindfold GET ONE!  They are cheap.  You can get them on Amazon for $5, or delivered in 2 days for $8.  There is a sensation when you don't know what's coming next that is exciting.  Every house should have a blindfold or 10.  We have several.

So then I've had to collect things that feel different on Jackie.  I picked up a piece of material a couple of years ago for Sexuary that she loves.  It's soft.  Very soft.  And when I drag it across her body it feels good.  So I got a piece that I can use to cover her and slooooooowwwwwwwlllllyyyyyyy drag off of her.  Her nipples will get hard doing this.  I love it.

A bottle of corn starch is then opened and I lightly drop it over her in places I'm going to rub.  First you get the sensations of the mini explosions as I drop it on her.  The she gets the silky smooth sensations as I rub on her body.

A few drops of warming liquid on each nipple will make her jump just a bit as each unannounced drop finds its way down and starts to spread.  Oh but then I get to rub it in better, suck on it, blow on it, each causing it's own sensation for Jackie to endure.

Over the years we've used candles, I'd recommend a soy candle here, ice, warming up your dildos in a bucket of hot water, feather boas, tracer wheels, massage oils, and more for different sensations.  It takes some work, you have to look around and see and think, 'hmmmm I wonder how that would work' and come up with a few different sensations, but they are out there and you don't have to spend a fortune at the adult toy store to do it. Not that we have anything against adult toy stores, we LOVE them, but you don't always have to go there for your sexual party favors when they are all around us.

So go do something unexpected for your significant other TODAY!  Surprise them with something new.

Dane

I know what your thinking....Corn Starch? Really?  I don't know why or how Dane found this but its like powder but its not, its smooth and feels great...I am always surprised when he tells me he used the Corn starch.  Oh that piece of material...just thinking about that makes me shutter...its incredible.

Sometimes its not the what is being used, its the not knowing what will be used and the sensations that is brought on with just touch.  He loves to see me cream and squirt but it doesn't always show in an outward way but sometimes its very intense inside my body like the endorphins release and body tenses and it explodes all in my head, all inside...not much outside to leave the mess...but it happens...And let me tell you it  was pretty intense  

Try something new with your partner!  Its worth it...

Jackie

Sexuary 2015 - Ordinary Items Used As Toys

Ok so it's Sexuary 2015 and you've haven't got an extra $75 or $100 or $200 dollars for a new sex toy, and the batteries are dead in your old ones but you want to have some extra fun in the bedroom, so what do you do?  Look around the house it's full of fun toys that can be brought into the bedroom for some excitement the next time you play.

Kim Bainger in 9 1/2 Weeks

Let's start with the simplest of stuff.  I remember the scene with Mickey Rourke and  Kim Basinger in 9 1/2 Weeks where a single ice cube and made millions of teenagers cream there pants as he ran it down over her lips and
body.  The ice can be used on either sex and lots of fun can be had.  Now I generally get a small bowl and a hand towel to go with it if I'm planning something like that, but yes, an ice cube found in your freezer can be a great addition to your sex toys.

I  know that not everyone wears ties like they used to, but I think most men have a tie or 2 in the closet.  Instead of leaving it in the closet, use it in bed.  Tie someone up and make them squirm (maybe with the ice cube from above), before taking it to the next level.  If you don't have a tie, use a belt.  Honestly you don't have to tie them to tight, it's more about the idea of being constrained than the actual constraint. 

Ok, not every house had cloths pins anymore, but for a dollar or so you can have more than you will ever need to play with.  As nipple clamps, on the scrotum, I've seen them in a row on the thighs or sides, or ear lobe or ...well you get the idea, if you can pinch it you can put a cloths pin on there.  So why? It's not only the pinching sensation, but the rush of blood once you remove the pin that is part of the adrenaline rush.  Oh a little trick I've learned is that a dime, penny or nickel placed by the spring can lessen the clamp.  So if your cloths pin is too much to be placed on the nipple, just put a dime there and see if that is better, if not try a penny or a nickle.Simple adjustment and you can still use the cloths pins.

While we purchased a piece of cloth for the next, a fluffy robe or a fluffy blanket could be used for feeling and texture once the person is blindfolded or maybe you want to just wrap it around your hand and gently rub. I like taking Jackies favorite cloth and spreading it over her and slowly sliding it down her body giving her goose bumps.  But in this case it's about the texture when they can't see.  

Have you priced a good paddle lately?  Yeah they aren't cheap by any means, but the paddle in our drawer is nothing more than a ping pong paddle.  The sides are lifting up and there's a couple of spots a bit worn, but that just gives it character.  A new one is only a few bucks, and I promise, as I speak from experience here, a good wallop with that will do the trick just fine. By the way, a good wooden spoon from the kitchen can do just as good of a job too. Oh and if you're into role playing and one of you is a student, a good hardback book could be your next paddle.

Got a feather boa or some feathers from some school project?  I will say not all feathers are created equal, but if you have something soft like that use it.

Don't have a blindfold to use?  Just take a t-shirt and fold it and tie it in the back or a scarf from her closet.  The idea is to deprive the 1 individual from a sense, that of sight, so anything will work.  Though blindfolds are pretty cheap if you look around.

Certain candles can be used in the bedroom too.  Dripping the wax can be very pleasure/pain enjoyable.  Not all candles are equal for this.  Soy and paraffin candles burn cooler and are easier to remove later.  Avoid most other candles as they can burn the skin.  I found a great article on wax here if you want more on it.

Two dice could be a great start for the night.  Each number on 1 die is a place on the body and the other die represents what you're going to do with it (lick, rub, kiss...come up with your own ideas here).  After a few rounds I'm thinking you won't need the dice any more.  And of course strip poker is always a way.  Another way is that the winner gets to take off a piece of clothing and the loser has to pay 2 minutes attention to that spot, or something to that effect, be creative here.

We play games with sports too.  Superbowl was 3 minutes of being eaten or blowjob for every touchdown scored.  In years past (when we didn't have company) that was due immediately upon scoring.  Made the game a lot more interesting for us and as the game came to a closer, we came too.  

Basketball can be how many points difference between quarters.  Even NASCAR can turn into a game where you pick a driver or team and winner gets xy and z. The difference between places at the 1/2 point and/or the end could be the number of minutes something happens.  If your driver/team wins you get bonus time. 

What we're saying is just because you can't drop a chunk of change at the adult toy store doesn't mean you are stuck with a boring sex life.  PLAN out a night with your partner where all the items used aren't meant to be used for sex, but you do it anyway.  They will be impressed you were thinking about them that much and the extra excitement can lead to so extra fun play.

Do you have a household item you use in your sex play?  Share it here so others can enjoy it too.  Get with your partner and plan out something together, sometimes the planning is as much fun as the doing.  Make this the Sexuary that you have a great Ah Ha moment with your partner and part of that is playing with everyday ordinary objects as sex toys. 

On this Valentine day, the 1/2 way point of and high holy day of Sexuary, find some way to make a difference in your relationship.  It doesn't take a lot of money to have a great time using toys in the bedroom.

Dane

Vincilagnia (tied up), Blindfold, Nipple clamps, & feathery things on Jackie

Japaneese ropes, blind fold, feathers and nipple clamps to start.  Of course there will be dildos, fire (wax) or ice, or various other unrelenting actions while you're tied down. (done to Jackie)

So today was about sensations.  Either taking them away or enhancing them.  It was something we've done before (or similar) and I know it's something Jackie and I both enjoy.  This is not something that has to be a lot of expense to do.  A blindfold is about $4 - $5 if you look around.  A bucket of ice.  A candle.  A piece of rope (though we do have some alternatives for the rope), a feather, a silk shirt, whatever is around use it.

In our case we found a velco mattress cover, on clearance,  that you can strap someone down to the bed with.  In the past I've used ties that are out of style and I no longer wear, we have some Japanese ropes (very soft ropes that tie easily), and the tie to a robe.  It doesn't matter and honestly the knots don't have to be that great, it's the idea of a bit of restraint to take away their ability to just take control.

The blindfold is to take away an entire sense.  If you take away the sight it's like your skin becomes more sensitive and the anticipation of what is about to come heightens your senses.  If you don't have a blind fold, then use a towel or something to cover their eyes.

I had everything I wanted on the ironing board by the bed.  Then I met Jackie at the door and blindfolded her.  I removed her clothes and put on a silk kimono she had (again going for sensations and the silk on her skin).  I then strapped on the cuffs to her arms and ankles and walked her upstairs to be where I then strapped her to the velcro holders for our new sheets.

After that she let me have total control for an hour or so. My job was to set her over the top with sensations. A cheap piece of cloth we picked up a couple of weeks ago was used to drap over and slide over her body.  A boa to tickle her.  Wax from a candle dripped on her breast. Ice rubbed over her nipples.  Her nipple clamps we used both on her nipples and on her clit (something new she thought of and wanted to try). Then once I had her upper body over stimulated I used her glass dildo that I had been setting in ice on her, then one of her old favorites a Beyond 2000 (kind of like a Rabbit).

Ok, so we had a good time and she was extremely stimulated and just took her over the edge.  The new sheets got a great christening.  I then got to reap the benefits of that stimulation.  While it wasn't necessarily new to us, we did use several new props and it was several fetishes and a great time.

The piece of cloth was super soft so tingled as I dragged it over her body time and time again.  The boa was new and she liked that too.  The sheets were new, and we paid 1/2 price for those and they are worth at least that much.  We used the nipple clamp as a clit clamp which Jackie told me she loved.  All of these things to enhance what we've already done.

So what could you do to stimulate your partner?  Look around, you've got several things in your house that would work.  Plan something today that will either enhance sensations or take them away.  Either way you can have the time of your life.

I want to add here that last year we did 14+ days, every other day.  We alternated who was 'in-charge' of the day.  There were some great days, but honestly there were days we struggled to get through the act of the day, and by the end of the month both of us were out of ideas and it almost got to 'ok here we go, let's get this over with.'  This year we've planned every day out.  We've actually spent about $100 in props and things to aid us. Admittedly I've lavished Jackie with a drawer full of toys over the years so dildos and vibrators we have plenty of.  But we're on day 5 and I can honestly say I've looked forward to every day so far and we seem to be a lot more at ease.

Look I know sex can be spontaneous and a fantastic time that way.  I'm certain some of the best sex I've ever had was just spontaneous.  But we live in some pretty stressful environments, and then to have to 'preform' for our partner and always bring an A game spontaneously is a lot to ask for.  I'm thinking out loud here, but one of the things I think I'm seeing is that we not only need to make plans for (write it in our schedule) to have sex so that our partners know they are important enough that I'm not going to schedule anything during our special time, but that we actually should be planning WHAT we are wanting to do.  Make that 1/2 the fun of the sex, the planning.  I can't tell you how much fun Jackie and I had when were were planning for this month.  All anxiety aside about the quantity of sex and the pushing the limits, the planning and especially the preparing for this month was fantastic and some of the best spontaneous sex we've had came from that.

I think when the guys take that kind of time with their partners that they get to remembering how special you really think they are.  That we wear rose colored glasses when it comes to our partners that don't allow us to see so many of their flaws that we know are there, but don't give two flips about, just as they don't care about those flaws in us.  I don't know a guy in a decent relationship that doesn't consider their spouse sexy, and hot as hell. That we fantasize about doing lots of things to our partners that they may never know about because we're to afraid to tell them in fear of being judged.  But it's them we're fantasizing doing those things with.  Ok, we have the occasional "put your favorite movie star or model here" fantasy, but we also know those are never going to happen.  A fantasy of spanking my wife's ass till it's red just might and will always be more powerful than those other ones.  But if we don't TELL our partners that, and tell them regularly how hot and sexy they are, they quickly forget.   The best way to tell them though is through actions AND words.
I'm certain when this is over we'll have some mundane sex in our lives, but I'm also sure that Jackie and I will start planning more sex sessions, maybe once a week or every other week that will be over the top.  After all there are still more things on that fetish list that we never even looked at.   It might be as simple as Jackie whispering in my ear "Day 6 all over again" and I'll know that I'm about to bend over and she's going to ride me me hard with her strap on.  I'll be hard all day thinking about it and OMG will I ever be excited when I she touches me. 

Dane


Let me start out by saying WOW WOW WOW...this day really had me excited.  I like the mixture of pleasure and pain. I knew of all the things we had bought for this day and couldn't wait to feel all the things on my skin.  I played with the nipple clamps off and on all day, I swear they were connected to my clit..I was super excited. Which is really unusual because my nipples and boobs are generally not a big turn on for me.

So the afternoon started with some anxiety.  I was nervous yet excited.  I wondered if this would push my soft or hard limits.  I really did not want to have to use our safe words because that is what this month is about. Pushing our limits and finding new things we are ok with, things we love, or things that we know are NOT ok.  So Dane met me at the end of our staircase, where he proceded to blindfold, undress me, put on a silk robe, and put my wrist and ankles in straps to get ready to be tied down.

I had known that Dane had spend part of the morning getting the room ready.  However I really did not want to know what was coming. I wanted to feel, hear, smell what was going to happen. He knew this too.  He walked me upstairs, blindfolded.  I already knew the count for stairs and could feel as we went up on the banister where we were.  He then took me and strapped me down.  He told me how at any time I could release myself. that he made it that way so I felt I had reached my hard limit it was a safe place.  It takes alot of trust...I mean  A LOT of trust to know that your partner will not harm you.  That your partner knows your safe words, and is willing to listen when you say ok enough is enough. 
My afternoon started with this amazing soft material just being caressed on me. It moved on to a little pain, nipple clips that can be adjusted to my comfort level. To more softness, via boa, some other soft things...ice, heat, soft...he just kept alternating with the different types feelings.  It was pretty amazing...He then got out different toys that just set me totally off the deep in. I then was unhooked and we finished off with a nice finish for both of us. It was an amazing and thrilling day...I sit here thinking I wonder if we could take something off calender and have another day like this. This day will definitely go into my "I have to do this again" book.

Being Flexible

So today was suppose to be "Vincilagnia (tied up),  Blindfold,  Nipple clamps, & feathery things on Jackie", but after the events of last night and the fact we could have better no kids time (read Jackie could stream louder if she wanted to) on Monday instead of today, and massages would be tonight.  We just thought it would be better overall for both of us.

We like massages.  Jackie went to massage therapy school and I've given several massages using the massage table we have over the years.  Massages are one of the best (could be) non-sexual ways to be intimate with your partner.  Even before we'd break out some lotion and just rub each other. When I'm giving a massage the physical contact is exciting to me, even when I'm not expecting any sex.  Ok, honestly sex is not normally what you're looking for after a relaxing massage, and if I'm wanting extra sex, that is not the way to get it.  I normally offer a massage to Jackie if I just want my hands on her body - I want that physical touch. And who doesn't want to relax to a great massage with their partners hands all over them.  And of course done right you could go from relaxed to stimulated in a short period of time.

I had a rough morning with what I figured was a case of blue balls, a severely tender right testicle all morning, an figured by Monday it would be better.  I also figured that I would be next to impossible for Jackie to get me off today because of it.

We did go by an adult store on our travels home, and had a great time visiting with the sales lady.  We needed to get another butt plug, and were looking for some other jewels for Jackies drawer of magic toys.  We also found some non-piercing nipple ring  The staff were great and we had a good time. Now I know that you can order all toys online now, but there is something about holding one and feeling it before you buy it.  You want to know you're going to like it, especially for the price of many of the good toys.  The places we visit are not the dark seedy places, but well lit, very clean, cater to women, and most of the employees are women who know how to talk to you about what you're looking for without making you feel like a pervert. 

Now I'm going to add here that while driving down the road Jackie decides to pull out her nipple and put on one of the nipple rings.  Oh my! Then she tells me she'd like to play our own game for Superbowl tonight.  First score she'll suck on me for how ever many minutes that the teams scored in points.  A touch down and extra point is 7 minutes, a field goal 3 minutes.  Then next score was hers.  Next would be mine.  Then hers.  Didn't matter which team scored, just a score. 

I love oral sex!  I love to receive and give oral.  I'm sure there are times that Jackie is like "alright already, just stick it in me already", but I really and truly love oral that much.  I love receiving it, but I can count on my hands the number of times a woman has been able to make me cum via oral (thankfully Jackie is a majority of those times).  But I don't ever count on cumming that way, even though I love the feeling of it. So back to the story.

YEAH!!! 7 points scored first!  Damn I'm a lucky guy.  Then 3 points, though I extended it another 3 minutes because I was enjoying it that much.  Lucky me the Ravens scored another touchdown.  While going Jackie turned enough for me to finger her while she was going down on me, and drenched me as she came several times hard. The buzzard went off and damn I was close and Jackie knew it and she continued on instead of stopping, Oh my! There went a load and a half that had been brewing for 2 days.

We had fun.  We both got some much needed relief.  And while it was not what was on the calendar we were flexible enough to know when the schedule wasn't going to work and honestly we had more 'out of the box' fun watching the football game between turns that, playing with the nipple rings, and oral that we got the relief, not just orgasms but relief we needed after last night.  Honestly we were so into our own game that we missed the first field goal, and wouldn't have continued on if we have finished up right before the kick-off.

We have 4 days down, 24 days to go.  We showed that while we have a plan, our personal needs override our plans, and flexibility is important in a relationship.  It was a wonderful game we played and a great way to be intimate.

What game can you play with your partner that would be different and exciting.  Ok, just thinking if you're a NASCAR fan maybe the number on the car in the lead at the 1/2 way mark is an indication of what you're going to do. You know right down a position or thing for each of the 43 drivers and then let fate take a hand in your fun. Or who evers driver is in the lead at the 10th lap gets something special for the next 10 laps.  Just make it up, no real rules, it's about time together and doing something that will keep the flames going.  Make up your own game.  I don't know many guys that would pass up an opportunity like this given the chance.  Jackie did a great job today of making that happen.

Dane

Today was supposed to be be a day of being tied up,nipple clamps, ropes, feathers etc.  However the kids were to be back today and it was just not something I felt we needed to or could do.  I also had had a horrible day the day before and I really needed caressing and not to be over stimulated like I knew that this day planned would be.  So I asked if we could switch our massage day with Vincilagnia day.  And part of this month is open communication.  I did not tell him the whole thing, I just told him I would like to change the days.

I did go to massage therapy school about 10 years ago, I never got certified but will still from time to time give massages.  They are very relaxing for me to give them.  I know how much Dane loves them.  I really had intended to give him one.  I am not sure why I changed the game again.

So anyway, we had a few other things to pick up at the adult toy story.  One of our favorites is Megaplexx.  Its not your average toy store.  Its got a great toy selection, great movie selection and some private movie viewing.  This is great store.  The staff is really helpful, our girl probably spent about 15 mins with us trying to find a new strapon or one that has a pocket so I can enjoy some stimulation while giving Dane a great ass fuck. We also looked at paddles, cat-o-nine tails, handcuffs and also some non piercing nipple and clit rings. I have debated for year about getting my nipples pierced.  Wondering if that would help me with the fact that sometimes I have NO stimulation in my breast, some days I do but I thought maybe the nipple piercing would help. Our girl showed us several so we got them.  I really wanted to see them on.  I wanted to see how easy they would be.  The thought really got me wet. So once we checked out with our stuff, we went out to the car.  We had not driven a block with I went way out of my comfort zone, I just pulled down my shirt and whipped out my boob(I thought Dane might crash LOL) I quickly put it on to see if I liked it or if it would stay.  I tried to put my boob back in bra, but it came off quickly so I just put it away and giggled at the rise in Dane's pants. He said he could tell it would be a day of teasing again. 

I then asked about the game. Maybe we could give and receive oral according to the score.  We really weren't for any team so I just thought a score was a SCORE.  We would set a timer for however long depended on field goal, touchdown, or whatever. Of course he went for it. So first time was 7 minutes and I went down on him.  I swear that 7 mins was forever, and we were really into it that we dint even hear the next team score.  I knew that he was already suffering from blue balls from the night before so was a bit worried that getting him all worked up would not help that at all.  So second score 3 points gave me 3 minutes of him down on me, he then gave me a 3 minute advantage...I took it ;-) Next touch down, he got 7 more minutes.  I sucked on him and could tell he was getting so close.  I was up on my hands and knees and let him play with me.  I dont usually since I usually don't have him cum in my mouth.  I love to give him blowjobs then finish him off with him nice and tightly in my pussy.  Today though I was OK with him playing with me.  I get so freaking excited while giving him blowjobs.  I know I creamed all over him several times while I was sucking on him.  I could just tell it wouldn't be longer when bam the timer went off, I just couldn't let him hang, so I kept going.  I even asked him to help me and then for him to tell me when he was about to cum and I would let him cum in my mouth. And that is just what happened.  I swear he has cups full of cum ready to cum out this time! There are times when he blows that I barely get a taste. Not today...damn it was a lot..I think it was a great day.  FYI: We spent most of the day looking at adult toy websites looking for non piercing nipple and clit clips and I bought a few...There is a lot of power of looking at toys and finding just the right one...I am not sure why but it was super excited about the whole day.  

Oh my thoughts have worked through the other night to and I am much better with it to.  If you had asked me to swing on sat again I would have said NO WAY, but I am not totally against it now.(just thought you might like to know)

So day 4 done, and day 5 is about to start.  We are going to be able to make it I am sure, we might have more times to be flexible and times we will stay on track.  We will talk and communicate more than we ever had.  We will grow closer...How will you get closer to your spouse? What can;you do to spice up your life? Be flexible,be resourceful, give your time but just do something!!!!

Jackie