Friday, January 31, 2020

Sexuary 2020 - Our Dungeon

Every once in a while the stars align and we get one of our bucket list wishes come true.  That happened for us when our 4 bedroom house became vacant except for Jackie and I.  What does that mean? It means we have PLENTY of room to do whatever we want in our house, and no one to wonder in 'accidently'.  So what did we do? We took all the toys we've purchased or built over the last 14 years and built a dungeon! I mean an honest to goodness dungeon!

We've enjoyed many kinks over the last several years (as you can read in this blog) and so we've added to our 'tools of the trade'.  We have the rack that can be used for rope suspension and I've added an adult swing for this Sexuary.

When a local dungeon was moving they had some of their equipment for sale, so when the spanking bench came up we snagged it.  It's way over kill for anything Jackie and I would use (it has hand clamps, and a male masturbater built into it.  It's very sturdy and while if I was building one I'd make some adjustments, for the $50 we paid for it is a great addition to our new dungeon area.

For those of you who build I'd make the center piece and the legs a bit adjustable so that the ass height and the comfort of the sub is better met.

Next we've got a massage table. OH the many uses this table has. Yes, we've done massages on it, but we've also used it as a bed. The head piece pulls out and so you have a square end to lay on. The legs are adjustable, so the height is perfect for Jackie to be laying on it and for me to have a straight shot into her treasure chest.

You'll notices the chaise lounger in the corner.  I know the old 50's movies used them to make the ladies look sexy, but Jackie can bend over the end, lay ass up, or ...well just us your imagination as to what all you can do with it.

Last is the St Andrews Cross I built a year or two ago.  I've built a frame for the bottom with the intentions of taking it places with us over the next year.  A couple of pins and 1 bolt and it will totally come apart and pack away.

The mats on the floor (which we've moved) really do make a difference when you're standing on the floor.  These are from Walmart and are 6 - 1/2" mats for $12.  We have about 125 sq/ft of matting on our floors now. They also are very easy to clean when Jackie gets very orgasmic. 

In the closet we have everything from floggers to needles, vibrators, dildos, butt plugs, masturbators, nipple and clit clamps, rope and suspension equipment, TENS units, Violet Wand, other electrical attachments, and anything else we've come across and wanted/needed over the years and of course plenty of lubes. 

We haven't played with everything here, the needles are coming but we are prepared, and there are other boxes I haven't unveiled yet so I can surprise Jackie when the time comes.  When we do have something we like, we go ahead and get good equipment and make sure we have a variety of them. Floggers for instance, we have 6 or 7 of them, varying weight and lengths (Get your flogger at Steven there will treat you right!). 

While over the decades we've spent plenty of money on putting everything in this dungeon together, it's not like the equipment in there is thousands of dollars. We probably have $500 - $600 dollars in floor equipment.  That's all 5 pieces. And if you're a great shopper like Jackie you could probably do it for less.The spanking bench was $50, because we just keep our eyes open for deals like that. You could probably find a massage table and other things for a dungeon. We have another $500 - $750 in 'toys' in the closet.  A lot of that stuff was purchased before Amazon and Wish were around and big into adult toys and gadgets, and has taken us almost 15 years to accumulate. So start small and go from there. Scan through and see things that are intriguing to you and get them. Soon you'll have your own collection for a dungeon if you're lucky like Jackie and I are. 


Sexuary 2020 - Playing with Sparks

So electricity is nothing new to Jackie and I. It is not a front shelf item, but it is something we breakout from time to time.  When I think of paincentric electricity definitely fits into that category.  There is a working through the pain that brings you to a pleasure that won't be reached otherwise.

This time though our rules changed a bit. In the past the person receiving the electricity has always been in control of the device.  You control the power, and most of the time you even dictated where and how long it would go on an area.  In our paincentric experiment I took that away from Jackie.

The beauty of electricity is it doesn't just stay where you put it, but it travels through the body.  The initial spark will tantalize the area, it can hurt so good!

We happen to have a professional TENS unit, but we also have a Violet Wand (knockoff) and a new Therapy Pen. 
Wish link
This little device is powered by 1 AA battery, and kicks a nice punch. For about $6 from wish you can have one too. When you have your hand on your partner and touch them with the pen you'll feel the electricity, no matter how far away your hand is. While I don't feel anything until about level 5, Jackie felt it at 1, so sensitivity is an individual thing. We never got to 9 last night.

Additionally, years ago we purchased an electric wand.  It's not a true Violet Wand (brand name) but does a great job. These start about $40 on Amazon.  They are WONDERFUL! Different attachments do different things. The experience you can create with this little device would definitely add to any spanking bench or St Andrews Cross. 

Amazon Link

Afterwards Jackie mentioned she'd like to pull this one further to the front of the list than it has been in the past. So I think it went over well.

On a side note, I also broke out a spreader bar for the first time.  It wasn't necessary for the play we were doing, but it was a great time to introduce something new.  They went over well actually. Better than I thought. I have other plans for it over the month, and now know she won't freak out over having them put on.

Where are you at on your Sexuary? Any plans? It officially starts in 2 days, so you still have time to plan something, ANYTHING different for next month.  Be it 1x or 29 times, do something out of your box!


Playing with I do not know what we are doing each day, Only Dane does.  This being said I knew that this would be a great night of play.  I started the evening with a margarita, a hot bath and an edible that I had made....Hot baths always mean a good clean shaved pussy afterwards...So after I ate the edible I got way over heated and quickly got out of the bath and got to my chair to cool off.  I had a pretty good buzz going as I sat there.  After about 30-45 mins I told Dane I was good to go.  

I thought I still had my buzz going but it wasn't long after getting into the leg spreader that he began tonight's session. I had been blindfolded so I couldn't see anything.  I heard a click click click as something came on. My mind going thru the roller deck of sounds...nope not this toy....nope not this one...well I never would have guessed it since it was a new one. He stroked it up and down...It was an electric pen type thing..I could tell it was a small head and not the violet wand.  While it wasn't painful, it did not get me to the edge like we had hoped.  He switched to the violent wand again it was great but never really got me to the edge.  Even his normal touching never got me to the edge. It was then that we both realized I was no longer high.  We did stop and lay together and talk about all that had happened this night, going thru the "thorns and roses" of the evening.  We did go later and finish up, after all this is Sexuary and its about both of us enjoying ourself.

While we haven't always played while I was high, we specifically know that it helps me with the Anixety of the unknown.  That while I don't want to be so high that I can't function, I do like the euphoria that makes my nerves on fire.  I love it really to be honest.  So this night was a bit of a let down due to that, but only due to that.  We discussed that I don't want this electricity s to go into the "back of the closet"  I would like to revisit it, both high and not...Jackie


Thursday, January 30, 2020

Sexuary 2020 - Overcoming Fears

So one of the new things Jackie has been worried about is the spanking bench.  I have obvious plans for it over the month, but they are frightful for Jackie, it's one of the reasons she doesn't know what the calendar has on it day to day.  I don't want her to get into her head before she can enjoy it.  It happened during one of our first Sexuarys and didn't want it to happen again.

Yesterday she was planning on taking a trip for the rest of the week, and had said that my lovely wife would be waiting bent over and waiting to be taken when I got back from work.  Well plans changed again, but she promised she'd still be bent over, I'd just have to find where she was bent over at.

I got home from work, 75% stripped before the garage door was closed and I was in the house looking for my bride. When I found her she was bent over on the spanking bench, her ass up in the air and begging to be taken.  After a few rips of my nails down her back I took advantage of her, all the while spanking her ass.

SHE alone chose that as the staring point, and it was to over come her fear of the bench.  How many things in life, but especially sexually do we avoid because we fear it?  I hear all the time how people are afraid of a flogger, or rope tying, or so many other things that if you got over the stigma and fear you might find you enjoy it. Don't let fear keep you from trying something sexually.  Anal is another so many fear, and yet I've told you how even I love a good ass fucking.  Take it slow, you don't jump in with both feet to start, but try it, whatever 'it' might be.

I had to carry Jackie off the bench she enjoyed it so much.  Her legs were weak and she was spent.  The floor was soaked and she was well satisfied.


PS, I LOVED the nice red hand prints on her ass when we were done.

So as we were prepping for Sexuary we pulled all our stuff out to get our own dungeon put together.  After seeing it set up I had a some anxiety.  Not sure why because most of it we had played with over the last several years so there was really nothing I should have been scared of.  There was a piece of furniture that we had purchased a few months ago that of course Dane had pulled in, pushed all the buttons , turned it off and on. He was very excited about all the potential things it could be used for.  So he brought it inside.  It sat there in the corner, staring at me, of course my mind went into freak out mode...I told Dane one day driving that the only thing that worried me in the room was the spanking bench.  I couldn't explain why but dang it did.

So here we are beginning Sexuary, I have had several days of being high and my nerves were LIT.  They seem to stay that way even a day or two later I am still electrified. I did take another hit off my bong and waited until I knew he was almost home from work. 
I had been teasing him all day long with text about being bent over and wonder where I would be.  I wouldn't tell him where I would be and that he needed to find me.  

So I went into our play room and decided that I would conquer that beast in the corner.  I layed over on it, put my wrist in the holders and waited.  

Dane did an amazing job getting me warmed up, getting me excited.  It was the one of the best nights we have had.  I was still on fire even when we went to bed I could still remember each and every touch, scratch, handprint, bite, kiss, touch.  I replayed them over and over in my head all night long.  I woke myself up dreaming about a great orgasm 2 times that night.  I can't remember the last time I did that.  

With all this being said, I conquered a fear.  A fear of the unknown, a fear of  what could happen, a fear of  fear, a fear of whatif....What did I do...I took my fear and conquered it.



Wednesday, January 29, 2020

Sexuary 2020 - Starting Sexuary a Bit High

We've always said we've had to be very flexible with Sexuary.  Our calendar is a great start but things happen and we have to be able to go with the flow. So of course we've had 2 major changes that have changed the calendar, and...well we've unofficially started Sexuary.  So totally unplanned, more it was meant to be in prep for Sexuary, we started.

So over the last year Jackie has had a couple of very positive experiences with pot.  A friend offered her some, and with my being ok with it, she imbibed.  Now when I was a teenager I experimented with some pot, but that was 40 years ago, and honestly I don't remember other than the munchie and spacing out anything about it. I sure don't remember the names Indica or Sativa. But during her playing around we found that she got, let's say very sensitive. My touching her skin would send her into a trance and to say she'd be very susceptible to monkey loving sex would be an understatement.  This fall we tried again and were disappointed when we found out that the Indica does not have the same effect the Sativa did, or the mix we found in California edibles.

So Jackie found some Sativa for Sexuary and was 'testing it out' and yeap, that was the stuff she'd tried before that did the trick.  My nails running along her belly, my bites on her breast and thighs, my lips on her clit all sent her nerves over the top.  Her orgasms were plentiful and over the top.  When done she had a couple of hickies, maybe a bite mark or 2 and the bed was soaked from the days adventures. Sexuary has started off with a bang.

Now I don't care you're position on pot. What I'm talking about is the side effects it has for Jackie sexually, and let me tell you they are positive! It's not like a drunk where you just get numb, it's like you've been electrocuted and all your nerves are firing...and oh boy that sure can make sex great.

I don't know the effects on everyone else, but the couple of edibles Jackie has made for this Sexuary should make it an interesting month.


PS, we're still 'officially' days away from Sexuary.  If your sex life isn't 100% perfect, NOW is the time to do something. Make a change! Do something different this month you don't normally do! The the aggressor, be the submissive, go neck in the car, sext with your partner, do SOMETHING different, now is the time to plan and execute that plan.

Jackie as you can see we have been playing around with pot.  Which one would do "the trick"? Which one causes a great buzz but yet makes your nerves on edge with electricity and which one doesn't? Which one makes you sleeping, hungry or or or or...

In our trying things out over the course of a year or so its been hard to nail it down.  Was it Sativa or Indica (I mean 30 years ago the question was is it skunk or not) The person whom I had been smoking with had no clue what she had since it was given to her. When I went to Cali I had to explain that I was a recreational user and that meant maybe 3 times a year in the last year.  They just suggested some edibles (which were awesome) but I didn't know until last week what they were.  

So this brings us to last fall.  I  get some "Sticky Garcia" which I later found out was an Indica Blend.  I made it into edibles and while I loved the "chilling" out part, in no way shape or form did it set me on fire.  Almost the opposite, I have now being taking them to sleep better.  I sleep hard as a rock after I eat an Indica ball. 

This past week I contacted someone and told them specifically I wanted Sativa and make it good.  I talk the talk but really have no idea about we pick it up, I have now bought a bong, a grinder, and storage to hopefully keep that wonderful smell  from being all over the house. I get home and have a hit or two not sure what to expect. Wondering is this what I was hoping or is this gonna be another let down.  Well let me tell you THIS is the stuff....Sexy flavor right now is Orange Crush...Holy Shit once it hit it was like every nerve in my body was on fire.  The breeze from the fan made me tingle, the clothes on my body were too much.  I can tell you each and every nerve in my body was LIT. 

Dane took me to the bedroom and trailed his nails up and down my body it was like  nothing I had experienced.  It was pure hot bliss.  You can't fight your body reactions the only thing you can do is roll with it.  Man did I roll.  Between the nails, the biting, the scratching, the spankings and (I am sure I am missing something) It was like no other time.  There is NOTHING that can compare to it.  It is even hard to put it down on paper the feeling of pure ecstasy, orgasms that roller over and over and over harder than the one before. OMG my eyes roll back in my head just thinking about it... 

So just remember if your going to experiment, start slow.  One or two tokes, one edible until you know how you react.  Sexy sativa or indca(in-da-couch) Any questions use this chart to help or ask.  If I don't know I will find out for you!--Jackie

Saturday, January 18, 2020

Sexuary 2020 - A Paincentric Month

Now that we're in 2020, and Sexuary is fast approaching, Jackie and I have had the opportunity to discuss and decide on what we wanted to do this year that would be different.  For those of you new to Sexuary, it was brought to us from Christine Moers and her blog Welcome to My Brain. Her challenge was to do something different sexually with your partner during the month of February, hence Sexuary.  To some, that means having being intimate for the first time in forever.  For some, that meant pushing your boundaries.  So Jackie and I have done variations of Sexuary over the years, from sex every other day ....which led to the year of sex every day for a month, to trying out different kinks, now that's where our lives changed.

So we've tried, and keep trying different kinks that allow us to grow sexually. Things we never would of thought we'd like, we do! Things we weren't ready for mentally (and let's face it sex is every bit as much sexual as it is physical) we are now.

So in our discussions, Jackie mentioned she would like to try a month centered around pain.  For those of you who don't know, pain and pleasure are close cousins.  The endorphins release in both are the same.  Your body can reach to pain all the way to an orgasm if you're very present and learn to use those endorphins. You can fly high on pain like nothing else. So this year we are going to be focusing on pain, and different ways to introduce it to the body.

The other thing we decided is that while there will be a calendar, only I will know what's on that for 25 of the 29 days, and Jackie will know what's on the other 4 without my knowledge.  There is no chance to over thing the pain coming for that day.  It will just happen in it's own time. On Mondays Jackie is in charge of the pain, and I will switch and be the bottom.  1) I enjoy giving up control sometimes, 2) I think every top should have the experience of being a bottom to see what they are doing, it helps when boundaries are getting close to know why those are there. Additionally we've added that every 4th day Jackies vagina will get a break.  Now, not to say there won't be any activities, but unless she just begs for it, those 4th days will have to find other ways to orgasm, ahhh the challenges.

So my challenge was set before me and I have created my 2020 calendar.  Of course we'll be blogging as we go, but unlike in the past we won't post a calendar of what's to come. 

And while obviously things like flogging, which we've already blogged about, will be in the mix, I have at least 10 different elements that we have not done before. Now some of these we've watched. Some we've taken classes on, either through Texas Kink Fest, or various organizations we've attended events with over the last several years.I will let out, since Jackie already knows, that we will be playing with needles some. We've found the art to be beautiful, and Jackie was very interested. So we've taken a class, I've ordered the material needed and we're going to try it.  Now for the record, we are using very small gauge needles, and at least at this time Jackie isn't desiring hooks or other large least for now. Pain as pleasure, all rolled into one.

Hopefully Jackie will put her two cents in as to her experiences as we try new things. We like to give both perspectives when we can. It's interesting when you see it from the others vantage point sometimes.

So there you have it. Most of the packages have arrived, my calendar is penciled in (always able to erase and change things around), and now we wait til January 30th.  This year due to other plans we're going to go from 1/30 - 2/27, with the 27th being a huge surprise for Jackie, oh I can't wait. We hope you'll join us on our journey and comment or question as we go along. If you're joining in on Sexuary, let us know! We love to know others are joining in, pushing their limits sexually, going where they don't generally go.  And we'll share some specifics on where we've learned some of these things as we go so if you want to try them you know where to get now we wait...oh the hardest part.