Saturday, May 27, 2023

Sexuary 2023 - Futo and Nipple Play


For those of you who read the blog regularly, you know I had Jackie's nipples pierced for her in Sexuary 2021.  It was something she had wanted, and we went to a trusted piercer that we have known for years and has even taught us a lot about needle play too.  

One thing about new nipple piercings is that it takes a good 6+ months to totally heal.  It's weeks before they quick hurting, and months and months before they are truly healed to the point you can safely pull on them more than just a little.  

So before Sexuary, I spoke with Jackie about pushing her nipple limits and if you will nipple torture for a new pain center.  She said that would be fine, so I planned it. 

First I ordered some rings for Jackie's nipples.  Normally she wears bars and that's fine, but I felt for what I wanted rings would work best. 

This morning I gave them to her and had her put them in.  I put her on the cross and tied a rope through each of the nipple hoops.  I then pulled, twisted and spanked her nipples.  I flogged her breast, I used a riding crop on her breast, all while blind folded and her strapped to the St. Andrews cross.  She was so excited she creamed on me twice when I bent her over and started in on her.  

Our plans for tonight canceled, and so I told her she had plenty of time, and she went and took a long bath reading a good book.  When she was done, I started tying up her legs, both of them, tight!  With both legs fully tied up I took advantage of her until her one leg that she's had issues with started to bother her.  We continued on until the 2nd leg gave her issues.  At this time I untied her 2nd leg and we laid on the bed.  

When we were laying on the bed, Jackie asked me to put the rope back through the rings so I could again give her pleasure with the nipple rings.  

I again started pulling on her nipple rings.  I pulled up, I pulled down, I slowly pulled one at a time and I would pull both.  I never yanked, but I would pull hard and hold it for a good length of time until her breathing would change or something like that would happen.  I fingered her twice to major orgasms.

When she was done, I finished on her breast, I felt like they deserved the spoils of the win tonight.  This is NOT something I do very often, but today it seemed very fitting.  

She is tender but not really hurting. She enjoyed the pain and liked the pulling hard on her nipples today.  It's something else we'll add to our bag of fun. 


Sexuary 2023 - Waken Up

So Friday has been rope night for Sexuary 2023.  but this night we invited "the girls" for dinner and drinks.  Now when that happens I become 'the cabana boy' when we get back.  I take all the orders and make sure the ladies are all taken care of with drinks and snacks if needed. 

I've done this in shorts or naked, just depends on the ladies that are over and my mood. But it keeps all the ladies happy and I can hear them laughing their asses off on the back patio while I take care of cleanup, setting up the spare bedroom for those needing it and so forth.  

But what that means is that our nightly activity gets put on hold for the night.  While I'll go to be by 1030 normally, the women can be out there anywhere from 1130 to 2 in the morning, well past my bedtime. When I go to bed on these nights I'll put ear plugs in and go to sleep so they don't wake me up. 

This night Jackie woke me up by pulling me onto my back and immediately dropping down and started sucking on my cock.  What a great way to wake up!!! She continued her assault on my cock until she was ready to be fucked.  By then I was wide awake and ready to abide her. 

While it wasn't the rope play planned, it was a great substitute. 


Sexuary 2023 - Thursday Throat Day

 Keeping with our day of the week theme, Thursdays are for throat play.  If you'll remember last week we tried, for the time, a full blackout choke after several times of breath play. 

I wasn't sure exactly what Jackie had thought, but knew it seemed to take her to a good place when we did it.  So this time I change things up just a little bit.  I got one of her favorite toys, Lucy, and had her start with that as I started with tonight's breath play. I would wait till I would feel her starting to orgasm when I would start the breath play.  It seemed to make it even more intense.  The first time, I had to count out from 45 to 60 so that Jackie wouldn't panic, but after that she was good with the 60 second count I do each time.  It always seems that first time is longer than it is.  

From my perceptive it seemed to make her even more excited and the orgasms came faster and faster. 

After several times of breath play I asked Jackie if she wanted to black out again.  She did, and so with Lucy in her hand to let me know when she went out, I choked her to a full black out.  She was very slow coming out of it, she remained in la la land for a good bit.  

Prior to starting I had already decided I was going to let her stay in that subspace as long as she could.  I did slide out from behind her and laid her down, laid up against her and covered her up with a blanket.  We laid there for about 30 minutes before she truly started coming fully out of subspace.  

One thing to remember, ANY time there is anything traumatic, extreme, or just exhausting, the bottom needs aftercare.  They are often times cold and a blanket, and your body warmth feel fantastic. Don't try to have a conversation with them unless they are talking to you first.  Just be there for them.  A piece of chocolate is a good thing to give them a bit of energy.  There is no time limit for them to come back to their sense fully.  For Jackie it's normally 10-30 minutes, but we had one time it was almost 12 hours before she was fully back to her senses.  It's ok, just make sure they are monitored and ok.  She also likes a weighted blanket, makes her feel secure. 


Sexuary 2023 - Dice Play

 So Jackie's day and she choose to play our dice game.  Over the years several of our dice have gotten unreadable (that happens when lubricant gets on them), and we only had a few left. *mental note order more sets, they are cheap on wish and the like*  In our game we add a regular die that we roll with so that we know how many minutes we are going to do what ever to where ever for.  

In her version, since it was 'my day' I only rolled the action die, and she rolled the action and location die.  I got to choose the location on whatever I rolled.  She would have to take whatever location she rolled.  

I definitely interpreted a kiss to be a french kiss on my cock. Sounded far to me. 

She got neck twice.  Once I choked her some the other time I rubbed her neck. 

We played with the dice for about 30 minutes as a warm up for even more fun. 

Now we've played this game for halftime of a football game, or to break the ice, or just to get things warmed up.  It's a simple, fun game that can have a lot of fun, especially if the dice are with you and get get those good rolls.  


Sexuary 2023 - Sex Art

In keeping with the arts and crafts Tuesday, I read about an idea of putting paint onto a canvas and then having sex on that canvas. The end result is sex art. So here are a couple of recommendations. 

1) I wish we'd gotten a cheap shower curtain for our art projects, but I put 2 sheets down and 2 blankets.  The paint wound up going through 2 sheets and onto the 1st blanket.  A shower curtain would of prevented that. So get a $3 shower curtain for the dollar store. You can tape the canvas to your shower curtain, but know it's probably not going to stay.  Also I recommend you doing this on a floor, and not in a bed so that the paints will smear better (that's why I had the blankets underneath for just a small bit of cushion.)

2) I got 2 yards of muslin, 36" wide.  I think that was more than enough, but you can make it as big or as small as you want.

3) I recommend you pour the paints on the canvas first and not on you.  I think they mix better and actually adhere to the fabric better. 

4) Don't smear it with your hand.  The paints will mix, just give them time and have more fun.  

So Jackie took about 8 colors from her 24 pack of paint and pinwheeled the colors on the canvas.  I did have her add a bit more paint in a few places I thought might be a bit thin.  

Then comes the fun part. Someone has to just dive in and get all into the paint and drag the other person into it.  I was the one that took that dive.  We did really have sex while making the painting but before either of us were finished decided to go clean up and then continue on.  I did have a path to the bathroom ready with towels, and I even had the spare bed made up with the sheets we used after Jackie's ass painting, but my unusually black cock wasn't as appealing as it might sound. So we hopped in the shower and scrubbed each other off before continuing the nights activities.

We let the paint dry for 24 hours before I moved the canvas.  I'm sure that was over kill, but we wanted to make sure it wouldn't make a mess anywhere else.

I have 2 options for framing that we are going to try.  I'm going to get an large embroider ring for a circular mount, and if that doesn't give us the effect we want, I've got a 24"x24" canvas that I'm going to staple gun it to.  When we get the final product, I'll post it here. 



Sexuary 2023 - Romantic Day 4 - Sensations


On the 4th week or I started out by sending Jackie to get her nails and feet done.  This is a treat for Jackie that I know she loves and makes her feel special.  It's not an 'us' thing, but it's a treat for Jackie and makes her know I was thinking of her.  

Afterwards we did our annual sensations play.  I cover her eyes and laid her back in bed and started.  I'd pulled out a dozen or so things we've collected over the years and had them handy. 

I start with a soft piece of cloth that we use as a seat cover for our rope play and run it down the length of her body.  It sends the goosebumps starting.  

I took a glass dildo that had been sitting in ice water and splashed it on Jackie. 

I run a wartenberg wheel over her, I'd purchased a new rubber glove that had 'tentacles' all over it.  I'm certain it had an odd feel as I ran it over her body. 

A rabbits fur we picked up at Tandy Leather for $5.  

Corn starch is extremely soft as you toss it on skin and slide your hands over it.  

Then came the wax.  The first drop did NOT go where I was wanting it.  I was aiming for around her nipple area and it dripped down the candle and hit her shoulder area.  This was an area with no corn starch, and just not where I was aiming.  We both took a deep breath and started over.  I generally hold the candle at shoulder height so that the wax has a bit of time to cool before it hits the skin. 

We also recently purchased a 3D printed plastic 'knife'.  It will not cut, but feels like it will.  It will also scrap the wax off of skin and bed sheets when you're done.  I used that to draw on Jackie's skin.  The knife cost us $10 at TKF, so I'm assuming you can find them for that or less if you look around. 

Soft, smooth, sharp, cold and hot are all sensations that can be used in sex, and on special occasions you can use them all at once to heighten the senses before playing further.  Hope this gives you some new ideas for fun in the bedroom that doesn't have to break the bank but is a lot of fun. 


Sunday, May 21, 2023

Sexuary 2023 - Sounding and Anal

 So before we started Jackie had asked for a weekend day for her.  Now I expected she'd want to get me high or something like that but boy was I totally off, and obviously she changed plans as what she did was at least in part things we learned about at TKF. 

At about 10:30 Jackie told me to go take a good long bath and be ready at noon, with a cleaned out ass and ready for fun. So I sat in the tub, read a steam story (The American Prince, part 2 of The American Princess series).

When I came out Jackie was looking hot in an outfit with fishnet stockings on.  She had me put on a harness I purchased last summer and had me lay in bed.

At TKF we went to LadyBoy's class on sounding.  They recommended rosebud sounds instead of the bars I had, and Jackie really liked them better than the ones I had before.  She also had a better idea on how to use them after the class.  

So she started with the 4 mm and worked her way up to the 10 mm.  It's funny that she was able to get the 10 mm in one time, but when she tried to put it back in, it just wouldn't go.  The 9 mm would slide in and out all the time with no problem, but the 10 mm wasn't going to go back in no matter how nicely it had gone in before.  

But she stroked me with each sound, and didn't take me long to have my first body orgasm.  Now if you've never had a body orgasm, it's not a little fluid coming out your dick.  It's from the tip of your toes to the hairs on your head on fire as waves and waves run through your body.  Jackie kept going and a bit later she had me rolling over and over again with orgasms.  I was just about to tap her to please stop when she did on her own.  But at this point every cell in my body was on fire.  She leaned down to kiss me and her hair rubbed over my body and every place she touched was like a mini orgasm all over again.  

She then put a dildo I had purchased a while back and never use.  It's a 9" dog cock with a knot in it.  It also allows the user to put a fluid in a syringe and push it into whatever cavity you're in (in my case my ass). After we were finished playing with the sounds, she had me masturbate and as I was cumming she filled my ass with the fluids.  I was a bit disappointed, not sure what I was expecting, but was more like an enema then what I was hoping for.  

She then covered me up and told me she'd be back in 15 mins.  My nerves were on fire and I just laid there trying to calm back down and come back to earth. 

When she came back she pulled out the triangle pillow and told me it was time for some ass play.  

Once I was up and over she started with a speculum and stretched my ass wide open.  It felt good and she got several good pictures.  This is something Jackie had been hesitant about, but after seeing it at TKF decided she could do it. I appreciated the class and all we learned there. 

After that she went for the big goal, she went for the fist.  Three times she put it in and out of my ass, each time rubbing my prostate from the inside and again sending me to another body orgasm.  

When we were done, I asked her to just cuddle up with me.  

Now the first part took almost 1:45 minutes, 15 minute breaks for Jackie, then another hour.  So almost
3 hours total. This is by far the longest scene Jackie has ever topped on me.  But I learned a few things. Oh and almost forgot, Jackie videoed the entire second part of the anal play for me, it was exciting to watch a second time.

First, I told Jackie I of used her up against me while she was at break, or maybe the weighted blanket.  My nerves were firing and I could of used that extra aftercare. I now understand why that kind of aftercare is so important. 

Second, I get why blankets are so important in aftercare.  I know it wasn't that cold, but I was freezing after all that.  All my body energy was for everything but to keep me warm.  Seriously it was just trying to get me back to earth and things back to normal, a place I was far from.  

Jackie and I have done a lot of things where I was a bottom, but never anything any better than this.  I don't know what her original plans were, but I know she truly had me in a great place and I really loved it. 


Sexuary 2023 - Spanking, Flogging, Caning, etc

 Today I spoke with Jackie before we started. "I'm going to push your limits tonight.  You can use your safe words, and nothing is new, but I'm going to push how far we go with those things."  She still didn't know what I had plan, but I did.  

I laid out all the tools I wanted to use tonight.  Again, everyone of the tools on the bed have been used time and time again, but today I was going to use them to an extreme. 

Before we got started, I went over again with Jackie her colors, green, yellow, and red.  I would ask her many times throughout the night where she was at, and how she was doing. 

So we got started, I blindfolded her, and then led her to the spanking bench.  I had put extra padding on the bench on her recommendation from the last time we used it.  I put a cover over the pillows to make it more comfortable. 

I started with Thor's hammer, that's the purple yoga block with a 1" dowel stuck into it.  Thor is a good start and a good thudder.  I warmed Jackie up with Thor and my fingers running up and down her back and ass cheeks.  There were lines from my nails and Jackie was moaning as I was thudding away and getting Jackie ready for the real stuff. 

I took a little detour at this point.  We don't do a lot of ass play with Jackie, but tonight I wanted to push her.  I lubed her up and put a small butt plug into her.  A pretty little thing with a pink gem shining out of her ass. It was beautiful and she took it like a champ. 

I then broke out the new heavy duty flogger and started flogging on Jackie.  Normally I'm pretty gentle, flogging for therapy, not for pain.  Tonight, I was swinging for somewhere in between.  I wasn't swinging to welp Jackie, but was wanting her to feel the stings of the flogging. Her back was very red and her ass was starting to glow a bit. 

From there I went to the riding crop.  I started at her feet and worked my way to her ass cheeks. 

I broke the bamboo cane out.  Here is where I laid 10 good hard swats, 5 from each side of the spanking bench.  Nice pretty red whelps started to form where the 10 swings hit. 

Now several times through out I would check on color.  Even a couple of times with each instrument I used just to make sure Jackie was good.  She had remained 'green' throughout the whole ordeal.  I also would reach back and finger her to an orgasm a couple of times, and would even bend down and fuck her till she'd have another orgasm and start again.  

So I bent over and I did something I had planned from the beginning but normally would not do.  Anyone who's read our blog knows that Jackie has been triggered by her mom's teacher paddle.  This paddle is one of my prized BDSM possessions, but it's really been a 'off-limits' item for Jackie.  I bent over though and whispered, "I normally wouldn't renegotiate in the middle, but I want you to let me spank you with your mom's paddle 3 times.  You absolutely may say no!" It didn't take her long and she had agree.  I asked her again if she was sure and she reassured me she was. 

I wend and grabbed it off the wall and took aim.  Paddle swat one lifted her ass and I knew it took it's toll on the already very red ass.  The second swat came and I stopped.  "Color?"  ...."Yellow"..."is it ok for the third swat still?" seemed like forever, and I was just about to put the paddle down when she told me yes, she was ready.  I gave her the 3rd and final swat and then moved her to the bed.

What was the first thing she surprised me with? "Do we have a larger butt plug?" Now I know she means just a bit larger, the next size up.  I run to the 'never use toy drawer' (after all it's way to small for me) and pull out a new plug and replace it with the pretty pink gemstone that was there.  

We finished up the night with the vibrator on her butt plug and both of us in a very good place. 

Afterwards we spoke, and Jackie liked the fact I'd given her the number 3 to know the limits of the paddle.  That almost immediately after I was done with the paddle she went back down to green.  

I had to stop Jackie from putting more and more into her ass.  It's not a regular play for us and I didn't want her to regret going to far to fast.  I would really like to add this to our play more regularly, and didn't want to push to far in one night.  I want to build her up to more and more. 

Over all Jackie was in a fantastic place when we were done.  Her only complaint? She would of liked more canning.  The 10 swats were not enough for her.  Noted! But she purred the rest of the night.  I swear she wanted me to fuck her some more as we were trying to go to sleep.  I had her in a very good place, and that is always a win for me. 


PS - The next day Jackie didn't have any issues what so ever.  Her red ass is all gone and the night before is all gone except for a desire to do more ass play, and another session with the play toys.

Sexuary 2023 - Ass on Canvas

 Sexuary 2023

 Jackie is a creative person, it's something we've never tapped during Sexuary in the past.  This year I've decided to change that.  

 Today I had a meeting and after that came home and got some things quickly ready.  I'd already gotten the supplies, and had Jackie paint a canvas gray for me a couple of days ago.  When Jackie came in, I sent her the following link -Viral TikTokTutorial | B00ty Paint Challenge so that she could see what I had in mind.  

 I found some old sheets and put one set on the guest bed and another on the floor in the dining room.  I had the paints and brushes ready.  Jackie got on the floor and I painted her ass with hot pink paint.  I then painted a calve and the plan was for Jackie to flip over on the floor, me to slide the canvas underneath her.  Well her ass hit the sheet and part of the canvas, but definitely not what we were looking for.  After a little laughter, we decided on a plan B.  We put the canvas up against the wall, we had to prop it up just a little with some little boxes so that her ass would hit it at the right height.  I again painted her ass and calves, along with her thigh.  Jackie tried a couple of moves and then accidentally hit the canvas, so time to go.  As she leaned back into the canvas and made imprints of her cheeks and calve onto the canvas. When she came off I painted one of her feet and she planted that onto the canvas too.  

 Per the instructions she then touched up a bit and added the luster paint on top of the pink.  She didn't finish it but she got step 1 and 2 done and ready to finish up later.  She'll go back and re-gray some of the spots that accidentally go some extra pink from the first slip, and whatever else she wants to do to make it hers.  

 I'm just ready to put it up in our bedroom.  

 To her surprise, I took Jackie into the spare bedroom and we made out and played, all pink all over the place.  The sheets have her ass print pretty clear on them, my crotch and legs were covered in pink.  It was funny and hot all at once. 

  To my surprise clean up was actually pretty easy.  The acrylic paints just kind of pealed off for most of it and then easily came off with a loofah. I was figuring I'd have to scrub it that wasn't necessary.  

 Clean up will be pulling the 2 sheets and throwing them away.  Again, they were old and if I hadn't had then I would of gotten a cheap set at Goodwill.  

    Jackie loves arts and crafts, I love her ass, it seemed like her ass on canvas was a perfect sexy solution to combine the two, and in the end, we'll have a piece of art for the wall that I will always get to smile at knowing it's really the imprint of Jackie's ass. 



Sexuary 2023 - Upper Harness Roping


We've really been working on rope.  We use to do rope every week for date night on Mondays, and somewhere along the way it's been dropped.  Oh occasionally we'll do a quick tie, but we use to do lots of suspension and all the ties that goes with it.  So we're a long way from where we were.  

Friday after dinner we broke out the ropes and started a harness.  Last time I had put to much pressure where Jackie had surgery. So this time I made sure that there would be no pressure there. 

I put on a top harness and then came down to her belly and did a few more wraps.  

Now, when I put her on the bed, the bottom ropes all gathered up on her belly, but the upper ropes all stayed put.  It was very distracting to me and a bit disappointing.  After a few minutes of playing I pulled Jackie up to pull the ropes off.  

She enjoyed the ropes, I was frustrated.  

It means I need to practice more on my ties and stays to keep ropes in place. Jackie would actually maybe start a weekly zoom/online session where were work with others to teach and learn.  Maybe, we'll see. 


Sexuary 2023 - Choking again

So during TKF we learned a way to choke that will within about 5 -10 seconds send a person out cold.  It's a bit scary, especially at first, but it's been added to our toolbox of things to try.

I spoke with Jackie before we started.  It was her call, but I wanted to continue to push her.  I really wanted to make her black out, and I wanted to work on her breath play too.  

Normally I lay beside Jackie when we do choking/breath play, but tonight I sat behind Jackie in the bed.  She wanted to make sure if she blacked out, that I would be able to hold her up.  

We started with breath play.  This month we've been working on Jackie controlling her reaction when she gets to the end of her limit.  In the past she would swat at me and try to pull my hand off, or something of the sort.  Now she can tap my hand or let me know.  If I'm close to my count I'll start to softly count out loud so Jackie knows how much longer we have and she'll hold tight and let me finish.  We're up over a minute. 

Now what does Jackie get out of this?  She gets a head rush that is incredible.  She goes to a space that is very peaceful and comforting.  

After playing 3 times with breath play, Jackie decided to allow me to black her out one time.  So I did.  She slowly came back too, and again she was in a very peaceful place.  

When we were done we laid there for a long time as Jackie drifted in and out of subspace. 

May you find the way to get in and out of subspace, it's a great place and only those willing to live on the edge will find that kind of space. 


Sexuary 2023 - Anal Fisting

 So one of the things I learned at TKF this year was that I was probably over doing it while trying to clean out my ass for anal play.  I've been taking an hour or more, to clean out for anal play and particularly fisting.  We learned that a couple of fleet enemas would be enough for what we were wanting to do.  Why is this important? Well first of all it only takes 15 minutes or so to run a couple of Fleet enemas through instead of the hour or so.  But more importantly it's not near as stressful on my bowels since I'm using a fraction of the water, yet Jackie says I'm just as clean as before.  This is a major game changer for me. 

So Jackie told me to get ready and we were going to try another ass fisting.  

At about 3:30 I did one Fleet, and then about 5:30 I did 2 more quick rounds and was done.  

I went ass up into the bed and Jackie put on the latex gloves and started lathering up the lube.  Using some of the techniques she learned at TKF she started working on opening up my ass.  After a while she grabbed a stretching dildo and worked it in.  When she was finished her hand went right into my ass, and after a few seconds a massive body orgasm hit me. There is just something about being massaged from the inside like that, that no other way can compare to.  

I get it, it's not for everyone.  There is definitely some stretching that has to be done, and there is a moment where it's a bit uncomfortable, but then....then OMG.  If you look through this blog you'll see where it didn't happen the first time for us, it didn't even happen the 2nd or 3rd time.  And even now we can have days that we can't make it, that's just part of anal play.  But if you're looking for something to fel amazing and push your limits, maybe anal fisting is what you're looking for. 


Sexuary 2023 - Canvas Picture Art

 So a couple of weeks ago I went online and purchased a canvas with a picture of Jackie that I had taken during Sexuary 2021. She was laying on the bed with one of my shirts on and just looked hot in it.  It was a black and white picture and the canvas was a 36" x 12" canvas that I have the perfect space for in our bedroom.  

I went to and ordered the picture.  I showed up about 4 days later.  I was very impressed with the quality of the picture and the speed in which I got it.  I did have to decide between the one, two, or three canvas pictures.  For this I decided 1 was enough, but I will probably go back at another time and order more from them with multiple canvases 

So Tuesday night came around and we had dinner with some friends.  When we got home I broke out the canvas I had ordered.  I asked Jackie to take her acrylics and paint part of the painting to highlight.  I should of taken a bit more care on the pictures, as really the only place to paint was her lips.  I would of loved to of had her fingernails too, but her hands were folded in the picture. 

She painted her lips and I have put the picture up in our bedroom already. It's cool to have the black and white painting with the red lips looking over our bed now. I love it and love that Jackie was able to put her personal touch on it. 


Sexuary 2023 - Romance Part 3


So in case you've missed it, on Mondays I've tried my best to be a bit more romantic.  Not so much kink, but over an above with loving gestures to show Jackie how much I appreciate her and love her even after over 18 years together.  

I was working closing up TKF and was going to be home much later than I originally thought I would.  But I had a plan and was going to keep it up.  

I ran to the store before she got off of work and got some flowers and was looking for a piece of chocolate cake when I ran into some chocolate dipped strawberries dipped in milk chocolate and brought them back to Jackie.  I took Jackie out for a nice steak dinner and then we came back.  

When we went to the bedroom, I rubbed Jackie's feet with lotion and then started on her back before we went any further.  

Afterwards we tried a different position that led to even more different fun and before you knew it we were laying in each others arms, all content and very close.  While we enjoy kink and kinky things, the romance of each others touch is just as exciting and satisfying as all the extra stuff we try so often.  

Don't forget the romance in your relationship, and this year for Sexuary 2023, I have made it a priority to bring it back for Jackie and I. 


Sexuary 2023 - Texas Kink Fest

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Thursday, May 18, 2023

Sexuary 2023 - Oh Well

Do you see a repeating theme when I tell you that things, even planned things, don't always work out the way you plan them?  So if you don't make an effort I don't know how any couple ever have sex.  So Jackie and I are getting ready to go to Texas Kink Fest (will be in the next post) and have plans to take lunch together so we can get a quickie in.  This is not something we do very often, so it's different for us. Unfortunately I needed Jackie to get a few things done for TKF before I left.  I was leaving on Wednesday and she was coming the following day with our neighbor.  If it wasn't 100% needed I'd of thrown her in bed for lunch, but I absolutely needed her to do something for me before I left. 

 So this day was a bust.  A goodbye kiss was about the best we could do. 

 I'll admit I was very disappointed.  I get very excited when we are going to play and very disappointed when something comes up that it doesn't happen.  Over the years I've had to caution Jackie against promising something sexual and not delivering because it really does hurt.  This was just one of those times though that nothing could be done. 


Sexuary 2023 - Romance

 So while this was supposed to be on Monday, in keeping with my calendar, it just couldn't happen.  Work, not feeling great, and not able to get things setup just made it where I had to swap days.  But that didn't help on Tuesday.  Things were still hectic, so I had to modify the plans again. 

Instead of making dinner I wound up taking Jackie out to dinner to some place that is around us but we'd never been to.  It was relatively early, so there were just a few of us in the restaurant. It was nice and we were able to talk and enjoy dinner, except for a CEO calling me because they'd lost their phone. I was able to push it off to a co-worker, and get back to Jackie.  

When we came back we took things slowly, lots of kissing and taking things slowly. Real slowly.  

We've gotten into some ruts, and one of them is hoping right into things and not take time with sex.  While we do often go out, even there we get into ruts and go to the same 5 places over and over. We have to have special time, special places to make sure there are days that are special 

When was the last, non-occasion that you truly did something special for your significant other?  Took them some place special? It's one reason we have Sexuary to  remind us to do these things. 


Sexuary 2023 - Breast Art

Once again the plans for Monday just weren't going to happen, so I decided to switch Monday and Tuesday's schedule for tonight.  

One of the things I have tried to plan this Sexuary is art projects.  While I'm not creative at all, Jackie loves arts and crafts.  So I've tried to tie Sexuary to her craftiness.  This week I decided to make plaster of Jackie's breast for her to paint any way she'd like.  This was an idea I got from a breast cancer page 

On the day of this we put down the sheets we've used for the painting, and I slathered her up with Vasoline.  Then I started putting the strips of plaster on her.  The first one got all crinkled up and I had to pull it apart.  After that I got the hang and started putting the strips on, going multiple ways and spreading them out.  At one point, the entire plaster was starting to slide off of Jackie.  She had to hold it up while I finished it up. 

Now when we finished, there were some thin spots.  Jackie went back the next day and added a few more strips of plaster to firm it up and fill in the soft spots. Now I'm just waiting for Jackie to paint it.  I'll update it in here when she's done. 


Wednesday, May 17, 2023

Sexuary 2023 - Change of plans again

Once again the best laid plans of mice and men come to pass.  Recently we'd met a couple that we've really gotten to know and like.  We've even play around a bit, a bit more than teasing, but not near enough to satisfy any of us. So we were looking forward to playing with them this Sunday and satisfying some appetites that have grown since our last encounter.  

Sadly one of them got sick while traveling and we couldn't get together.  Another plan by the wayside. 

So I break out the floggers and put Jackie up against the St. Andrew's Cross.  Little did I know that something that day had triggered Jackie and she needed a release, a release she gets sometimes through pain.  This day was one of those days.  

After a series of abnormally rigorous flogging for Jackie, she was able to release, the release she was looking for.  

It's interesting to me that even though I didn't realize she needed such a release, I chose one of the best ways to give that to her this night as an alternative to what was planned.  Instinct? Reading body signs and just not realizing it?  I just know that today I was able to give Jackie what she needed when she needed it, and why? Because we stepped out of the ordinary to the extraordinary with our sex life, with trusting each other and because we make each other our priorities.  

What have you done in your relationship to make your partner your priority, to try something different, so push your boundaries? 


Sexuary 2023 - Needle Play - Shadow Pictures

 So this day was going to be busy before we ever started out.  I would be out of the house by 530 in the morning and then meet Jackie about noon for a family gathering, in another town.  We'd be home late so I knew we couldn't plan any long term Once we got home though, I had some plans before we'd play. 

You see, I'm supposed to get a picture a day from Jackie.  While I like the sexy pictures, I wanted pictures of her feet, eyes, breast, sexy poses, maybe in lingerie, what ever she wanted to send me. A friend of mine had sent me a link to taking shadow photos.  I had tried them and pretty cool, so I wanted to try them with Jackie.  

The idea is you put a flashlight between the person and the wall and then take a picture without flash from the other side.  So we experimented with Jackie and the results were amazing.  To see the instructions I followed go here - 

But after taking pictures, t was time to move onto the next part, needle play. We decided to do a mandala of sorts.  While I'm not a perfectionist with needles, I'm getting much better aligning them for designs.  This design used 5 different size needles from 27 gauge and bigger.  

This design took about 30 minutes to do.  When I was done I always allow Jackie time to just live in the moment.  After a couple of minutes she asked me to come press on them.  After about 90 seconds of putting pressure on the needles with my hand spread wide, I let go again, and again, I sat on the bed and allowed her to be in the moment, where ever she goes in times like these. 

After a bit she was ready to have the needles removed.  One at a time (I've learned the lesson of trying to do more than one at a time) I pull them out.  In this case from the largest to the smallest.  This is part of the process and as such, part of the mental state that Jackie achieves     through needle play. When I'm done I cover her with a weighted blanket and darken the room.  Music plays in the background, and I lay back on the bed and wait till Jackie has fully gone through her subspace and comes back to Earth.  

Another day of Sexuary 2023 is done, and we've tried something new.  


Tuesday, May 16, 2023

Sexuary 2023 - Rope Play

 On Friday Jackie's sister was coming to spend the night for a big day the next night  We had a bit of time between getting off of work and her family showing up.  I decided it was a good day for some rope play.  

I was able to create a harness and cupcake tie (tie the breast up so they flare a bit at the end) and laid her on the bed and started making out with her.  Unfortunately, because of her new implant she wasn't able to stay in that position roped up for long.  We had to stop and untie her before we could continue on. 

I will admit, that threw me off having to stop like that and then start back up.  Jackie persisted and We made the night work, but it's something I'll have to remember.  The implant in her back is new, so still having to figure that all out.  

If you're interested in roping, there are great youtube videos.  One of my favorite sites is You can look on Fetlife and find a local roping group too, that's how Jackie and I got started.  


Sexuary 2023 - Choking

Over the last year or so Jackie and I have delved into choking and breath play as part of our sex life. It's different for us, and the rush to Jackie's brain when the blood and air start to flow puts her into a very special place we can't achieve otherwise. 

Mind you we are careful, I'm always counting and knowing where she is, and while we've pushed her, shes never blacked out while playing.  
In the past though she would panic at times, making it more difficult especially when we were doing breath play.  So tonight I calmly told Jackie I wanted her to focus on staying calm...fade if she could... but not to panic.  

There are times I hold her jugglers and count, and then when I release after about a 30 count, the blood will rush back into her head.  Normally there is no panicking when I do that. It's when I hold her nose closed with one hand and cover her mouth with the other that she sometimes panic.  But I asked her to just hang with me.  If she had to tap my hand.  If I was very close to where I wanted to be I would count out loud for her so she knew there would only be a could of seconds left. 
In the past we've worked up to a count of about 45, but I knew if I could keep Jackie calm she'd go much longer.  The longer the hold, the bigger the rush afterwards.  The first time after talking and calming her we made it to 60 seconds without any problems.  On the second attempt at about 54 seconds she tapped my hand and I counted out 5, 4, 3, 2, 1 and then let her breath and she held with me.  The third and final time I could tell about the same place she was about to panic but she held it to the full 60 count.  
After each time I whispered words of affirmation on how well she was doing. She was into such a space we had to pause for a few minutes to let her come back to earth before moving on.  
It's different.  It's not for everyone, but it is something we enjoy, and the thought of Jackie just fading out for a minute is extremely exciting for me personally.  


Sexuary 2023 - Anal Play

 I love ass play, there is no secret in that.  But sometimes no matter what we want it just isn't going to happened.  This day I cleaned out and when Jackie started in I had a sharp pain happen.  It felt like a cut on the inside and to say it was painful would be an understatement.  Unfortunately it hurt so bad that I didn't want to do anything else till to late in the evening.  

It's part of Sexuary for us.  Every year we have a day or two that just don't happen the way we plan them.  Sometimes it's illnesses, sometimes it's attitudes, sometimes it just doesn't happen.  Today was one of those days, but at least we tried. 


Tuesday, May 2, 2023

Sexuary 2023 - Kick Off - Romance

Sexuary 2023 - Romance
 The last 6 months or so have been rough for Jackie and myself.  Jackie has had 3 surgeries and 1 of them has affected her sexually, the other two have helped her back and pain caused, but it's been a long road to recovery.  This is life.  One day while playing one night and having to stop because of her back issues, we were talking and she mentioned she things her body needs to relearn so many things.  This led me to opening Seuxary 2023 with a romantic day.  A back to basics approach to things.  
 Sometimes we get so caught up on the next great adventure that we forget that getting here is part of the fun, and oh, by the way we had a great time then too.  
 So this morning I had to run to the store and picked up a bouquet of flowers.  Little did Jackie know that was the start. I sent a message that dinner would be at 5:30.  Now mind you we're empty nesters, and unless we are going out to eat, we generally just nibble on something and not really eat a dinner.  Tonight there was going to be dinner.  
 While Jackie occupied herself I set the table with the flowers and a candle.  I brought out the real plates (normally we are paper plates only), and threw dinner in the oven.  I picked her up a chicken parm, and a pesto salmon for myself.  I also made salads with homemade blue cheese dressing, and stuffed mushrooms for appetizers.  We ate to music in the back ground and the candle light flickering across the table.  
 I then gave her 30 minutes to go partake in her 420, and then come back in.  We kissed a little but then I led us to the shower where I washed her hair, and kissed on her while in the shower.  When we got out I brushed her hair for her until it was totally unknotted and  nice and soft.  
 We headed to bed where I took my time kissing on her and licking all over before slowly and purposefully taking her.  It was full feeling and full of contact.  I could tell by her actions that the plans for tonight had hit a nerve and done the job I was hoping for.  
 Sexuary 2023 is off and running and while each weekday has a 'theme' of sorts, the weekends are a hodgepodge of events.  This year I'm going in a totally different direction then in the past.  There are new things coming up, and some totally out of my zone, but I know that Jackie will love them.  
 When was the last time you took the time to plan a date, or an evening with your significant other?  Made sure they knew you thought them important in your life.  I wrote this in a group I belong to today, and I know it's easy to overlook:

"While we love Sexuary in February, it just didn't work out that way this year, but our relationship deserves a conscious, purposeful month of making sure we are number one to each other and we keep ourselves out of the ruts that life so easily slides us into."
  Hope if you're a regular reader of our blog you follow along this month, comment if you'd like and most importantly, do something outside of your norm to make sure your partner knows they are still number 1 for you!


As you all know Sexuary in February just couldn’t happen due to other things in life. So, we talked about what we should do…So now here we are May 1st.

I have told Dane, in years past that it causes me too much anxiety to know what’s going on the calendar for the month.  So, while we talked about ideas, I left the planning to him.  So, leading up to the month, I have seen several packages come in that were not in Dane’s normal shopping habits.  I have seen paint, brushes, canvas, and other “artsy crafty” type things.  So that is what I have known thus far.  I had some things that he asked me to do before the month started.  My mind has been thinking for over a week on what was going to happen.  I told Dane that I felt like it was waiting for Christmas morning.  I just can’t wait to see what he has planned for us.

That leads us to day one.  I am told supper is at 5:30. While I went and took a nice hot bubble bath, had a glass of wine, and read part of a great book.  He cooked a fancy meal.  I say fancy since we don’t normally use real plates, bowls and such.  (We compost all our paper plates and goods) Next came a shower, a nice washing of hair and then he combed it out. I cannot tell you the last time he did that.  Dane really pulled out the stops for the night and it took me to the place I needed.  He touched, licked, scratched all the right places. I was feeling so nice.

 It’s been a long time; our date nights have begun to include others and we need to get back to us.   This was the perfect start to Our Sexuary….