Friday, January 30, 2015

Sexuary 2015 - Sex Toy Myth Buster



So before we get started with Sexuary 2015, I felt like maybe we should go over some myths about sex toys.  There are plenty out there and if we’re going to talk about how they can make your sex life better, we should understand what they can and can’t do. 

Myth – Toys are for just for lonely women

Fact – The adult sex toy industry is over $15 billion a year industry.  That would be a lot of lonely women. Let’s face it I remember a day when if you wanted to get a sex toy you had to pull up to the back side of a brick building that looked non-descript that was at least 50 miles from your home, and put on your sunglasses to walk into a poorly lit area and quickly grab a toy before someone you knew pulled in and recognized you. It’s the way it was.  Now between internet sales and brightly lit stores that cater to women and couples there is no reason not to have sex toys.  There are now parties that are hosted at homes so it’s more personal, and the days of the seedy sex stores are all but gone.  The sex stores today are nice, clean, well lit businesses that cater to women in a lot of respects. 

It’s estimated that in the 70’s only about 1% of the women had sex toys, today over 50% have them.  Shows like Sex In The City and the Rabbit toy used have made sex toys more socially acceptable.

Oh, and let’s not forget the men side to the industry.  Yeap, toys are for men too, and as more and more men are talking about it more and more are trying them, both on their significant others and on themselves.


Myth – Sex toys will stretch me out and I won’t be able to feel my partner or will be too loose for him. 

Fact – A sex toy small or large is not going to permanently stretch you out.  Your muscles in the vagina will get looser over time hence the Kegels and keeping the muscles in shape. But the toys are not going to cause that stretching any more than having sex with a large guy is going to stretch you.   I found several references to Betty’s Barbells that can assist you in your Kegels if you’re interested.  You might look up vaginal barbells or Betty's Barbell if you want some more info.  But bottom line is a big fat dildo/vibrator isn’t going to ruin you for a man.


Myth – I’ll be electrocuted if I use my vibrator in the shower.

Fact – The reason they make waterproof vibrators are to protect your investment in the vibrator.  The moisture getting into the battery compartment will ruin most vibrators.  The small amperage and voltage used in vibrators could if conditions were just perfect, a complete circuit out of the battery compartment you could possibly, maybe, get a small zap like a light switch in the winter.  So basically you’d have to submerge the vibrator to cause a circuit. But conditions would have to be perfect and the zap would not in any way be life threatening.  For the record most ‘waterproof’ vibrators have a rubber ring between the battery compartment and the top or plate that encloses it.
You still need to make sure the battery compartment is dried out or your vibrator is waterproof if you don’t want to ruin your vibrator after playing in the shower.


Myth – No real man would use a sex toy with his partner

Fact - A recent survey by the University of Indiana's Kinsey Institute shows that 45 percent of American men have used vibrators in partner sex at least once. One in 10 has done so in the past month. So the ‘real man’ thing is out the window.  Look in cars we put superchargers to make the engine run better.  In sports we train with weights to go longer or higher or whatever.  Sometimes it just makes the sex better when we’re outside of our norm or have some add-ons.  But if I’ve heard it once I’ve heard it a dozen times, “a vibrator just isn’t the same as a cock, and sometimes a girl just needs a good cock fucking.” A vibrator doesn't say "I love you" or make dinner or take her to the movies when it's all done either. So have no fear guys, it might get her through the moment, even a long spell, but bottom line most women still want you in the end…the toys, they just put the spice on the meal.


Myth – Sex toys are just for women

Fact – Most sex toys can be used on both sexes.  A vibrator or dildo doesn’t know the difference between a vagina and a rectum.  Prostate or Perineum stimulation from a vibrator can be extremely pleasurable for a male.  Whips and paddles don’t care the sex of the flesh they land on.  A butt plug doesn’t care the sex it finds, it just wants to squeeze between some ass cheeks and firmly plant in an asshole.  Guys have several places that can be stimulated by adult toys.  And that doesn’t even cover the ‘pocket pussy’ or similar devices that help him masturbate. So no, sex toys aren’t just for women.

And just because we’re talking about men and toys, I’m going to make the clear statement here, NO you are not gay because you like your prostate stimulated.  It means you’re opening up to another way to have an amazing orgasm.  The fact that to reach that part is through your ass is just an engineering design issue, but does not mean you are gay. 


Myth – Good sex toys cost a lot.  

Fact – We’ve found toys for less than $10 that was on our favorite list.  We’ve found toys that cost over $100 that were junk.  We’ve picked up very good toys over $100 and crap less than $25.  It really depends on the toys and what you want.  Generally, not always, the quality of the toys material and it’s life expectancy of a higher price toy is better, but that doesn’t make it a better toy. This week we posted a picture of our toys, and someone pointed out we have a $4 ping pong paddle in our collection.  Damn fine toy it is!!! Everyone has their own personal preference on toys, so if a $10 toy hits the spot right, then that’s the toy for you.  We’ll talk about the different parts of toys at another time, but make sure if at all possible you try any electronics before you purchase it, or if you’re getting it online that you can return it if it’s a real dud.


Myth – If I use vibrators I won’t be able to have an orgasm with a man later on.

Fact - No, not true. Sometimes women use vibrators to learn how to give themselves orgasms and can then better explain to their partners how to make them have an orgasm. Sometimes it will help get a woman 'warmed up' easier than other methods. But the one doesn't exclude the other.

Per a Brown University study most women orgasm through clitoral stimulation, and not vaginal stimulation and many would never have an orgasm with just intercourse no matter what the guy did. 

Hope these facts help us move into Sexuary with an open mind about toys and their use in the bedroom (or where ever you might us them).  

If you have another question or heard something about sex toys please ask below or send a messge to us. 

Remember if you'd like to join us for this years Sexuary Play Time Facebook group you have just a couple of more days to find us and join in the upcoming fun.  You can lurk in the shadows or be in the middle of the conversation, there is no pressure to be in the middle of anything in the group.  But if you want to have full access you must join before Sexuary starts.  

Dane

Tuesday, January 27, 2015

Sexuary 2015 - Sexuary Play Time


We're only 5 days away from Sexuary 2015!!!

So this year Jackie and I have decided to focus a bit on toys.  So much so that we've started a Facebook group called Sexuary Play Time.  It's a closed group, but if you'd like to join us for this years Sexuary adventures please request to join and we'll add you.  Starting Sexuary 1st it will become a secret group and you'd miss out on all the fun conversations that we'll have.  All the articles we work on though will be posted on this blog for everyone to read.

What is Sexuary you ask? I'd have to refer you back to welcometomybrain.net and have you just pull a search of Sexuary.  You'll be amazed at the openness of Christine and her embracing sex as a part of her life and marriage.  So Jackie and I dove in.  First year trying to just have sex for 7 straight days..then every other day...then we went the great year of 2013 (that started this blog) and had a different kink for 28 straight days!  Last year because of family health issues we had to slack off, but this year it's back on!

But Sexuary isn't about how many days in a row, it's about connecting with your partner.  It's about communication.  It's about opening up to new ideas and trying them.  It's about exceeding the ordinary.  To some of you that would mean you'll have sex in Sexuary. Yeap, even once would be a struggle.  For some of you, it would mean you too will try to hit 28 straight days (or 31 if you want to try for a REAL month).  It's about getting out of your comfort zone and seeing that there is more out there then what you have.  We've decided to pick sex toys as the way to do those things this year.

Again, Jackie and I have decided to focus on 'add-ons' this year.  You know those things that take good and make them great.  Those OMG did we really just do THAT?  We'll let you know what we've found out about sex toys and with any luck get some great feedback on what you the readers have learned about sex toys.  Ever gotten one home that looked great in the package only to find out it's a dud?  We'll tell you what we do to prevent that. We'll talk about caring for them.  We'll talk about the different types of toys we have and have had (oh the THOUSANDS of dollars we've spent on sex toys is pretty amazing).  We'll also talk about some very inexpensive, or things around your house, things that you can use in the bedroom to make a session better.  So it's something we have a passion for and wanted to share this year.

So we hope to see you on Facebook, if not check back here regularly throughout Sexuary for updates....just 5 days and counting!!!

Dane

PS..This is Jackie...come on Sexuary...I just can't wait to see whats in store..