Sexuary 2024 - Needle Play

 

One of the bitter things about Sexuary every year, is the 4th.  It's the anniversary of Jackie's mom passing.  It's never a great mental day, though it is much better than it use to be.  Most year I've done something painful for Jackie on this day to help relieve the pain some. 

So this year I decided to do a tribute of sorts to her mom, who passed away indirectly from breast cancer.  

So I let Jackie know I had planned on some needle play.  She went and prepared herself and then I brought her in.  I had setup the massage table, covered it with a blanket, put 30  - 25ga needles in a bowl (popped them out of the package but that's all), turned on the serene music and then brought her in.  After she was up on the table, I covered her with a 2nd blanket I had set aside. 

I cleaned her back with alcohol, and then started with my design. 

I pulled out about 20 more needles when I'd used up what I had, and continued on. Then a few more, and a few more till I was done. 

I did my usual, I took a few pictures, then I press on her back over the needles, and so forth.  I then showed her one of the pictures.  Jackie immediately started crying.  I let her.  She needed this release, and the pain alone with the acknowledgement of what day it was, was enough to let her truly release her hurt for the moment. 

This picture is after I had pressed on her back and messed up a few, but you get the drift, it's the ribbon for breast cancer. 

I then let her lay there on the bed, as I quietly waited on the bed for her to be ready for me to pull the needles out. She let me know when she was ready and I one by one, removed each of the needles from her back leaving the holes that reminded us of each needle that had been in her back. 

I cleaned her back with more alcohol, then covered her with a weighted blanket.  When she's was ready, I got her up and cleaned up the materials, put the bed away, and cleaned up.

So while it wasn't the multiple orgasms of the day before, it was part of our sex life.  It's the intimacy Jackie needed today.  Sex isn't always in penetration, and just like romance starts in the morning, not in bed, today, for us, sex was about meeting my partners needs. 

Dane

Sexuary 2023 - Texas Kink Fest

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Sexuary 2023 - Needle Play - Shadow Pictures

 So this day was going to be busy before we ever started out.  I would be out of the house by 530 in the morning and then meet Jackie about noon for a family gathering, in another town.  We'd be home late so I knew we couldn't plan any long term Once we got home though, I had some plans before we'd play. 

You see, I'm supposed to get a picture a day from Jackie.  While I like the sexy pictures, I wanted pictures of her feet, eyes, breast, sexy poses, maybe in lingerie, what ever she wanted to send me. A friend of mine had sent me a link to taking shadow photos.  I had tried them and pretty cool, so I wanted to try them with Jackie.  

The idea is you put a flashlight between the person and the wall and then take a picture without flash from the other side.  So we experimented with Jackie and the results were amazing.  To see the instructions I followed go here - https://www.tiktok.com/t/ZTRwCmYeX/ 

But after taking pictures, t was time to move onto the next part, needle play. We decided to do a mandala of sorts.  While I'm not a perfectionist with needles, I'm getting much better aligning them for designs.  This design used 5 different size needles from 27 gauge and bigger.  

This design took about 30 minutes to do.  When I was done I always allow Jackie time to just live in the moment.  After a couple of minutes she asked me to come press on them.  After about 90 seconds of putting pressure on the needles with my hand spread wide, I let go again, and again, I sat on the bed and allowed her to be in the moment, where ever she goes in times like these. 

After a bit she was ready to have the needles removed.  One at a time (I've learned the lesson of trying to do more than one at a time) I pull them out.  In this case from the largest to the smallest.  This is part of the process and as such, part of the mental state that Jackie achieves     through needle play. When I'm done I cover her with a weighted blanket and darken the room.  Music plays in the background, and I lay back on the bed and wait till Jackie has fully gone through her subspace and comes back to Earth.  

Another day of Sexuary 2023 is done, and we've tried something new.  

Dane

Sexuary 2022 - In the Aftermath Needing a Reset

 

Even when you conscientiously put sex into your life, there are lulls, rough spots, and routines that just seem to drift into play.  Jackie and I are no more immune from those than anyone else.  During those times we'll take a day or a weekend to reset things.  We'll have a mini Sexuary of sorts. 

 This was the case a week or so ago.  Seemed we were a bit out of sync, things were getting 'normalized' and we needed to shake things up. So after breakfast we hit the sack for a first round of sex.  Good and satisfying, but was even more satisfying was when I told her the entire day, 2 hours after we finished I expected her in the bedroom and ready for another round of something.  I let her know that round 2 would include anal play and if she needed to do something for that please do. 

 Two hours later we were back at it.  Scratching, and some of her favorite impact devices followed by my spending a good time in her ass and both of us having huge orgasms.  "You've got 2 hours from now to be ready" I reminded her.  

Two hours later I had the ropes ready and I tied her up and let her spend a bit of time in her subspace before attacking her mouth first and before going down and finishing up inside her. "Two more hours" I again reminded her.  

I gave her an option this time.  She decided she wanted some needle play.  Again, after her design was done I gave her an orgasm or two and then let her drift into subspace for a bit.  Afterwards we masturbated and both were finished for the day.  

By then, it was well after 8 and we were done for the day.  But in the mean time my blood pressure dropped several points as I became more and more content with life.  Our closeness again closed in and "WE" were in a good place.  

Yes it took some effort on both of our parts.  Yes we were both pretty worn out after 4 or 5 hours of sex throughout the day.  Yes it was worth every bit of it!!!

 Sometimes you really have to just mix it up to reset everything and that's exactly what we did.  You can do something similar.  Maybe it's 2x today ...maybe you do it like we did every 2 hours after we finished... come up with your own, but do something to get out of that rut.  It's only July and a long way till Sexuary comes back around, but every day can be sexuary when both of you are willing to work together to make it that way. 

 Dane 

Sexuary 2022 - Needle Play - Day 20

What the sign doesn’t say, is it’s because YOU have allowed that into this marriage.  Thank you so much!!! – 143

After a day with friends and family we were able to settle down. After my weekly grooming I setup the massage table for tonight's activities.   I pulled the needle box out, the alcohol, the trash can and water for both of us.

When we were both ready, I brought her into the room and let her know what was going on.  I then gave her the choice of whether she wanted it on her front or her back.  It makes a difference on what pattern I would choose.  She decided for it to go on her back, so she climbed up on the table on her belly and got ready.  

I got to going and started putting in the 27 gauge needles in a row, with a nice curve at the ends.  12 needles on each side of her upper back.  Then I dropped to 25 gauge needles and put 13 orange ones on each side.  I kept making sure that Jackie was ok.  Then came the 23 gauge needles.  These are definitely a bit bigger and there were 14 on each side, and the blue tops tops lined the tops. 

When I had the rows done I came back and filled in the middle on the spine.  

I was very pleased with the 'wings' 

I asked her to let me know when she wanted for me to remove the needles, but otherwise I'd just let her sit there enjoy the moment.  "Hard choice, I'm so horny!"

I knew how to take care of that, and while she was on the table I helped her while she had the needles in.  The needles started to 'wave' as she would tense up and release.  Her skin rolled and it was hot to watch the wings wave.  

I removed the needles and cleaned her up with alcohol.  As you can imagine the alcohol is NOT her favorite part.  She then relaxed and I covered her up to let her be in the zone for a while.  

I then started to masturbate while watching her and when I finished she asked if I could make her cum again. After several more orgasms she just laid there and zoned out again.  

So if you're interested, the needles I got on Amazon or Ebay.  I get 25 per box, and I generally order 100 of the smaller and 50 of the larger needles at a time.  I don't order anything for needle play larger than a 20 gauge, and definitely use more 27, 25, and 23 gauge than the rest. 

Where you put them is all dependent on the person you're putting them on and their tolerance.  This was a larger piece with over 80 needles used.  This was a lot and Jackie had to be in the right frame of mind to enjoy it, otherwise it would of just been pain. 

While it's a bit 'over the top' for something new to try, at one time we didn't have a clue on needle play.  It was out of our realm of play things, and yet we took that chance and did it not knowing what the results would be.  

How many times have you not done something in fear of the outcome?  We've failed many times in our adventures, but we keep trying, sometimes the same thing again, just to make sure it wasn't a fluke.  It's called growth.  Don't let that fear stop you from trying something different with your partner.

Dane

Sexuary 2021 - Needle Play

So when I drew today it came up "Needle Play".  Now I knew this was an especially tough day for Jackie.  It was the anniversary of her moms death, and I knew that pain can be very cathartic for her.  I could allow her a relief she wouldn't get any other way.  In the past that often means a good flogging, but as luck of the draw would have it would be needles. 

Now I'm by no means a worlds leading artist in any format.  I've played with the needles, and frankly they are a bit tough to make a design that is anything.  Definitely not as easy as it might seem.  But I wanted to do a heart.  It is Sexuary after all, a time for love, and I thought the symbolism of a heart on this day might help her out some.  So I had an idea and prepped.  I got the massage table out, the needles and prep (alcohol wipe, gloves, disposal canister, trash can, and camera) all ready.  

When she was ready I blindfolded her. We've found the anticipation when she watches takes away from the ordeal, and leads to some anxiety.  So blindfolded it is. And then I started. 

WOW, only 5th needle in and she feels like I've stabbed her 6" south of where my needle was.  I showed her with her hand where I was, and that I was no where near where she thought.  I asked her if I needed to stop, and she assured me she would be ok, so I continued on. 

There were times as I continued her emotions welled up inside of her. I would make sure she was ok, ask her color, and continue on.  We were 3 from the end when she wanted to stop. THREE!!! I asked her if she could handle the 3 more and she said yes, but only 3 more. 

When I finished I took the pictures..and held my hand on the needles and let her feel the sensations.  This zone is as important as the putting in the needles.  I let her stay there till she told me she was ready to remove the needles.  I quickly removed them and took more pictures.  The raised areas are beautiful.  The heart on her chest was lopsided a bit, but still one of the best designs I've ever done. 

Needle play is one of those not very conducive to intercourse afterwards, but it does bring you closer.  The trust Jackie has that I will not hurt her, the love I have as I am putting those needles in, knowing that even as they hurt, they are healing, is all part of the process that those not in the lifestyle will never understand.  I get it, while I have never been vanilla, I have been in vanilla relationships.  There is a difference. This relationship, and the work we do in Sexuary is very important to us!!!

So I've included the pictures of the 50+ needles in her chest, and then of the heart shape left after we were done.  Honestly it looks even better the day after, though there was a yelp from the shower as the warm water hit that area of her chest. 

Do a couple of things if you are going to try this: 1) make sure you get sterile needles individually wrapped.  Once the package is opened either use it or dispose of it. 2) always wear gloves, but remember, odds are eventually you are going to get poked yourself too.  3) Sterilize the surface to be poked with alcohol before and after (yes it's going to sting afterwards, but better than an infection), 4) Dispose of your needles properly.  Originally I had a coffee can with a taped lid and skull and crossbones on it, now I have the same as hospitals...but either way these are bio hazards, treat them as such.  5) remember proper aftercare.  This can be just as traumatic as a flogging or more, remember that. 

Hope this helps, and for the records those are 27 and 25 gauge needles I used.  Since I was doing so many I went small.  

Dane

Sexuary 2020 - Needle Play

One of the things Jackie had expressed an interest in was needle play.  We've seen it several times at events we've gone to and it intrigued us. We've actually been to classes on this taught at Kink Fest by Guru Sean. We've also seen his extreme works where he goes all the way up to hooks.

So class taken, and supplies ordered.  I've pulled out a couple of each needle size and tried them on my leg just to practice a bit and to know a bit what it feels like and practice a bit of technique. I really believe anyone who would do something like needle play should know what they are inflicting on anyone they are applying it to.

Even though Jackie wants this she's a bit nervous the day of.  I try to keep her calm and we get her on the massage table.  We're going to work on her upper back today. I've let her pick the spot, though I tell her we'll want to try other spots. I wipe the spot down and make sure it's clean and sterile, gloves on, the box with needles ready and here we go.

I've got an idea, I want to make a heart on her back, but not sure how it's going to work, but like all of Sexuary I'll be flexible if I run into problems. Of course I start with the smallest needles we have.  I put in a few of them. I have to admit Jackies reaction isn't exactly what I expected.  She's having to breath through each stick.  My inexperience has a couple of the needles going further under the skin then others. This is not what I'm wanting for a 1st time try. 

The heart, well let's just say the attempt at a heart, quickly disappears. I can't create the curves needed to make the heart. I'm sure it's doable but it's not happening today, by me. Plan B, be creative and make it look ok. So I create a symmetrical pattern (my logical mind at work). I use every size needle we have.  She definitely feels the larger ones, but honestly not as much as I was afraid she would. 

Twenty-one needles later we were finished. I felt that was a great place to stop. I'd of loved to try a couple of other spots, but sometimes knowing when to stop is the most important part of any kind of play.

Now I think Jackie thought I was going to let her off easy, but this is Sexuary 2020, the pancentric month of sex.  I hadn't seen any orgasms happen yet. So I grabbed the magic wand and while Jackie was still on the table I applied it to ...well you get the idea.  It didn't take long before a mind blowing orgasm hit.  The pain of the needles turning to pure pleasure as her body blew it's orgasmic gasket.

While removal of the needles can have some pain, they honestly don't hurt much pulling them out (I know from experience even).  Needles all put into the collection box, the alcohol rubs definitely burn a bit as I clean up a little of the mess. I put meat packing over the area (the absorbent pads that are on the bottom of the meat packaging work great for this, thank you Guru Sean),  and we go to relax. For the rest of the night Jackie definitely knows she's been needled, but it's not unbearable, and at times, it's just a gentle reminder of the great afternoon we've had together.

If you're interested in needle play I suggest you find someone who is in it, ask LOTS of questions, try it on a thigh or something on yourself to see what you're getting into. Read what you can. I think I've spent about $30 in total for 250 needles of varying size, and all the gloves, etc.  I took an old coffee can and made it into my needle collection (sealed the top, cut a slit in for hte needles and marked it as hazardous).  So it's an inexpensive 'kink' to try out.

Sexuary is in full fling now...do you have any plans? Are you going to do something different for Sexuary 2020 this year? You still have time, go for it!

Dane

Needle play, well I asked for it.  I have actually been asking for it for a while but we just never have done it.  So that was certainly one that would be on the calendar this year.

I had told Dane that I was nervous. I wasn't sure what I was to feel or how to feel but I can tell you that it wasn't anything I have felt before.  

I have gotten tattoos before and this can't even compare.  From the very littlest needle to the biggest one I had to breath through each and everyone.  It was painful but not painful enough to stop.  Once all the needles were in, it actually didn't hurt as bad.  I didn't get up and walk around but I did move my arm around to see what it felt like.  I could feel them but it was not terrible.  It did not make me cum while he was placing needles, it still  was exciting.  It really didn't take long when Dane got out the the wand to make me come.

The after effects felt like I had a slight sunburn and maybe a little heat like you get when you have a shot or tattoo.  

We will defiantly be looking at this again.  Once is truly not a real experience.   
Jackie 

Sexuary 2020 - A Paincentric Month

Now that we're in 2020, and Sexuary is fast approaching, Jackie and I have had the opportunity to discuss and decide on what we wanted to do this year that would be different.  For those of you new to Sexuary, it was brought to us from Christine Moers and her blog Welcome to My Brain. Her challenge was to do something different sexually with your partner during the month of February, hence Sexuary.  To some, that means having being intimate for the first time in forever.  For some, that meant pushing your boundaries.  So Jackie and I have done variations of Sexuary over the years, from sex every other day ....which led to the year of sex every day for a month, to trying out different kinks, now that's where our lives changed.

So we've tried, and keep trying different kinks that allow us to grow sexually. Things we never would of thought we'd like, we do! Things we weren't ready for mentally (and let's face it sex is every bit as much sexual as it is physical) we are now.

So in our discussions, Jackie mentioned she would like to try a month centered around pain.  For those of you who don't know, pain and pleasure are close cousins.  The endorphins release in both are the same.  Your body can reach to pain all the way to an orgasm if you're very present and learn to use those endorphins. You can fly high on pain like nothing else. So this year we are going to be focusing on pain, and different ways to introduce it to the body.

The other thing we decided is that while there will be a calendar, only I will know what's on that for 25 of the 29 days, and Jackie will know what's on the other 4 without my knowledge.  There is no chance to over thing the pain coming for that day.  It will just happen in it's own time. On Mondays Jackie is in charge of the pain, and I will switch and be the bottom.  1) I enjoy giving up control sometimes, 2) I think every top should have the experience of being a bottom to see what they are doing, it helps when boundaries are getting close to know why those are there. Additionally we've added that every 4th day Jackies vagina will get a break.  Now, not to say there won't be any activities, but unless she just begs for it, those 4th days will have to find other ways to orgasm, ahhh the challenges.

So my challenge was set before me and I have created my 2020 calendar.  Of course we'll be blogging as we go, but unlike in the past we won't post a calendar of what's to come. 

And while obviously things like flogging, which we've already blogged about, will be in the mix, I have at least 10 different elements that we have not done before. Now some of these we've watched. Some we've taken classes on, either through Texas Kink Fest, or various organizations we've attended events with over the last several years.I will let out, since Jackie already knows, that we will be playing with needles some. We've found the art to be beautiful, and Jackie was very interested. So we've taken a class, I've ordered the material needed and we're going to try it.  Now for the record, we are using very small gauge needles, and at least at this time Jackie isn't desiring hooks or other large gauges.....at least for now. Pain as pleasure, all rolled into one.

Hopefully Jackie will put her two cents in as to her experiences as we try new things. We like to give both perspectives when we can. It's interesting when you see it from the others vantage point sometimes.

So there you have it. Most of the packages have arrived, my calendar is penciled in (always able to erase and change things around), and now we wait til January 30th.  This year due to other plans we're going to go from 1/30 - 2/27, with the 27th being a huge surprise for Jackie, oh I can't wait. We hope you'll join us on our journey and comment or question as we go along. If you're joining in on Sexuary, let us know! We love to know others are joining in, pushing their limits sexually, going where they don't generally go.  And we'll share some specifics on where we've learned some of these things as we go so if you want to try them you know where to get started...so now we wait...oh the hardest part. 

Dane