Sexuary - Dungeon Party

So to end Sexuary we had a birthday party for me at the Austin Dungeon. It's the beauty of having a birthday at the end of Sexuary. So in November Jackie and I decided that this years birthday party would be at the Dungeon.  You can't imagine how excited I was when the decision was made and the deposit was made for the day.

Then comes the next fun decision....who the hell can you invite?  It's not like you can just put out on Facebook that there is a birthday party where we are going to get wild and kinky.  But we have met friends that we knew were in the lifestyle and might just not consider us totally freaky and block us forever.  So the list of 13 people were invited.  Some were unable to come right from the beginning and some backed out for 1 reason or another up until the day of party.  We still wound up with 6 of us there.

I of course was naked as people arrived...cause that's just me.  We had found a Dominatrix outfit for Jackie to start out in. Of course she had to have something to show up in, then she changed, leaving her high heels on and her new cock we got that morning for fucking me with.To say she was fucking hot would be an understatement.

We got to the Dungeon a bit early to set up and get ready.  We didn't have a whole lot of set up, bringing in towels and a bit of food.  More would show up but we just wanted to get started, and let's face it this was a party I didn't want to be late to this party!

The rest of the couples showed up and since not everyone knew everyone we went over a couple of rules. One of the things we've really adapted is the consent rules of if someone says "No" 1x that's the last time you can ask for the day.  A "Maybe" means you can ask 1 more time, but 2 "Maybes" means a no for the day...see rule 1.  After that the fun started.

Now we'd never played with Gomez and Morticia, but we had some 'moments' with them and spent some time with them.  Jackies first french kiss with a woman was with Morticia around a campfire.  So we were hopeful things would work out. Gomez was a bit shy at first, but after a little liquid encouragement even he jumped right in.

We started with me on the spanking bench, bent over while Jackie used the new vibrating cock in my ass.  Others came around and my hands found pussy's and cocks to play with while my ass got pounded.  Thomas and Kitty worked their magic with my ass and mouth and eventually after a while and plenty of satisfaction we took a break. 

After a short break I put Jackie up on the cross where we flogged her.  Several of us took turns and I got to show Morticia just how hot Jackie gets while being flogged.  We drenched the floor with her cum.  I'm not sure why no one believes us, but Jackie seriously squirts when she's orgasmic.  After that we started with other groups forming and group hugs, feeling each other up, licking, sucking, and fucking for the next several hours.   We had the Dungeon for 4 hours and we used every minute of it.  When we left I don't think there was 1 genital that wasn't satisfied. A couple of them were a little raw, and the next day there were some abs that were sore from all the fucking and orgasms.

I think my tongue was the happiest it's ever been.  That night there were several first for different people.  It was a total no judgement zone where everyone was there to have a good time and celebrate my birthday.  I can't imagine a better birthday party every.   Great friends, great sex, and just a totally wonderful day.

I know there are Dungeons for rent in many large cities. Go for it! Figure out that handful of friends you can invite and rent a Dungeon for your next birthday party! Honestly I'm thinking of doing it 2 - 4 times a year I had so much fun!

Dane

Sexuary 2019 - Anal Fisting

Ever since our first Sexuary that we went out on a limb and started trying 'kinky' stuff, anal fisting on me has been 1 of my absolute favorites.  Honestly Jane has confided that there is something about having her hand and wrist deep in my ass that's pretty hot for her too. It's one of those that not only gets me off, but has a long lasting calming for me.  It will embrace my entire body and release all the tension from the top of my head to my toes. 

This year, once again, life tried to get in my way of this favorite of favorite nights.  It's hard make sure your sex life is a number 1 priority, and that's part of what Sexuary is about, putting it back as a priority in our relationship.  But instead of saying 'fuck it' because it got late and because Jackies day had started with her throwing up from migraines, we made it happen. I did NOT regret it. 

We tried some new lube we'd been recommended for fisting, J-Lube.  Gotta tell you, if you want to deal with cold stringy cheese that will create a spiders web of lube then this stuff will work.  One container will make a ton of lube, but so far we're not impressed.  So Jackie quickly switched back to our favoirte for this Elbow Grease.  In fairness to J-Lube I did read where you can microwave it ahead of time and it will change that 'snottiness'.  We'll try that another time when I can premix it earlier in the day. 

But Jackie caressed my asshole into opening up after a little work and sure enough she reached in and hit that spot.  There is NOTHING like when someone hits that spot deep inside of me.

So a few "FAQs" that we always get:

1) Yes, I always take about an hour ahead of time and 'clean out'.  Multiple flushes of enemas until I'm getting clear fluid.  Sometimes that's 45 minutes, sometimes that 90 minutes, but it's well worth the time for me.  And while I actually get off a little on enemas, I'll admit the 90 minute times are a lot.  

2) Yes, we use TONS of lube.  If you think you've used enough you're probably only 1/2 way there.  This is an ass, and it's not self lubricating and normally you're not putting large objects in it, so LOTs of lube is probably an understatement. 

3) Yes, sometimes it will still make a bit of a mess.  But I keep a towel under me, a towel on the side for all the toys to sit on, and a towel for Jackie to use to wipe anything she needs.  Even if it's just the mess of the lube it requires a bit of preplanning to prevent a mess. 

4) Does it hurt?  I'll admit there is 1 point right before her hand slides completely in that stretches me to my limit.  It's a bit uncomfortable and a twinge of pain...but my mind knows that little bit of pain is about to bring a lot of joy.  And honestly it's only the first time her fist goes in.  After that she can go in and out without any problem.  Once her hand has been in there my muscles relax and you could drive a Mac truck in there I think.  

5) After effects? This is the odd one to me, honestly, except for the entire body euphoria, within 5 minutes of us finishing up, my ass feels nothing out of the ordinary.  NOTHING! It doesn't hurt, it doesn't tingle, it's like it never happened.  Now we only do this every 6 - 12 weeks, so there's been no other side effects either.  Ok, honestly I'd do it more often, but it is a lot of work.  

This time Jackie surprised me by taking a couple of pictures with her hand deep in my ass.  She knows how much I love pictures, and I didn't ask, she just did it. Gotta love a partner who surprises you like that! 

You know when we started, I already loved anal play, but let's face it fisting brings it to a whole other dimension.  It was out of the box and definitely a 'kink' play for us.  AND if you read through the 2013 blog, it didn't 'just happen'.  It took us several times before my ass accepted it and her knowledge of what's back there allowed it to happen.  But we went there and tried it and today it's definitely top of my list. 

So get out there, try SOMETHING different.  You don't have to stick a hand up someones ass, though if you do bravo to you.  Maybe some finger play in an ass is a new and fantastic sensation.  Maybe just touching all over your partners body is different.  But go there and try it! Do something different and get out of that rut. 

Dane

Sexuary 2019 - Kickoff and a Challenge

 So Sexuary 2019 is about to begin on Friday.  I don’t know it it’s 6 or 7 years of us celebrating Sexuary, but it’s been a few.  A couple of them have been flops.  Most of them have been not only fun, but enlightening.  We’ve found new things that we enjoy sexually.  We allow each other to explore and not be judgmental.  It’s definitely opened our eyes to other things out there that we never would of found if Sexuary didn’t exist. 

So what was Sexuary about?  It was about doing something different.  For some it’s about having sex this month.  For others it’s exploring strange new ideas.  We started with every other day for a month with a different ‘kink’ every time.  Then came the great 28 days of sex, with 28 different kinks.  Some of those we still practice, some we’ve written off, but we at least tried them.

So our challenge to you is in Sexuary, DO SOMETHING DIFFERENT!!! Make time for a real date and sex afterwards if that’s something you don’t do generally.  Buy a new toy and wear it out.  Read through our blog and find a list of ideas that cost nothing or VERY little.  Cornstarch for silky smooth caressing.  A pair of dice for a game of what to do and for how long.  Some ice.  Getting it on in the living room instead of the bedroom.  Or you can go extravagant and plan a weekend away, hit a burlesque show and fuck like bunnies all weekend. Whatever it is you don’t do, try it!

For us, we’ve got our days lined up.  Nineteen of twenty-eight days are scheduled with fun and adventures.  It’s not the most we’ve scheduled it’s not the least…but we’ve added more rope play (this is a new this last year for us).  Ropes and suspension are now part of our repertoire. 

So go….NOW, go and figure out what you’re going to do this Sexuary.  Surprise your significant other and just make plans that will freak them out because they don’t know who this person they are talking to is…but they love it anyway and are going to take advantage of it. J ….What are you doing still reading this blog? Go…..and have a GREAT Sexuary 2019!!!

Sexuary 2014

So the start to Sexuary 2014 is here.  It's to be the last official Sexuary for welcometomybrain.net and Christine has posted the theme and thoughts for this years Sexuary.  You can read her blog post here.

I'm struggling here a bit to be honest.  I've been thinking about it.  "me" is where I started my sexual journey as most young boys do.  "me" is the selfishness inside that says "hey, what about me?" "me" is the thing I've tried to let go of over the last 10 years as Jackie and I have struggled through the ups and downs of our relationship, especially our sex lives.  There is no doubt even though I'm almost 10 years senior to Jackie, my sexuality is far more open, for more outreaching, and honestly can be far more selfish than hers.  My kinko meter barely registers when hers is off the scale.  My sexual wants are 100x what hers is.  I would say I was born 10 years to late, but not even the 60's would fit me properly.  Maybe I was born 20-30 years to early, ahead of the times with some of the things that reel me in and turn me on. 

And don't get me wrong, Jackie is no prude.  Hell a 'normal' wife would of just called me a pervert and kicked me out.  Anyone reading this blog knows that what Jackie and I have done just over the last year is more that most couples would do in a lifetime together, and that's just what we've told you about.

And yet...........

......There is parts of me that I have boxed up, strapped with duct tape, bound with chains and thrown away the keys to keep sanity at hand.  Oh they are there.  I hear them pounding in the cellars deep below.  They echo up the stairwell calling out to be release at times.  Periodically I let Jackie glimpse into the cellar, though rarely does the corner of a box get opened.  She knows those boxes lay down there, it's not a secret, but still  I do my best to ignore them.

When life gets in the way, selfishness of 'me' comes boiling up and screams in my head.  It happens.  Just this month due to circumstance well beyond anyone's control it has been screaming.  Oh the arguments they scream.  It's even easy to believe them at times.  

And again.....

.....I've learned that there HAS to be 'me' in or there can not be an 'us'.  While the sum of the 2 can far out 'be' what the individual parts can 'be', when the individuals are on full power....and while one of a pair can sometimes pull the other out of a funk, remind them when their self vision is being clouded by life or the current situation...nothing but nothing can cure 'me' like me!  If I don't take care of myself, physically, mentally, and even making sure my sexual needs are met, there is no way I can be healthy. 

I've learned that sometimes I need time to myself.  Sometimes that's not just a couple of hours, but a couple of days.  And it's ok to need and take that time. 

I've learned that I can ask Jackie to consider to go through the dusty boxes and find something she'd be willing to consider, just because 'me' needs some special care. Those boxes are who I am, and THAT'S OK! Jackie can always say no, though more than likely she'll just alter it enough to be comfortable if she needs to, but even she's come to realize that is who I am, and it's ok to be me! 

I've learned that if my BP is 180/100 or my blood sugar is 380 then I can't be my best at anything.  And that while 'working out' isn't my thing, the benefits of just 3 days a week on a treadmill is me showing love for myself as my BP drops to 120/80 and my blood sugar drops to 110.  It's a love that 'me' can only give myself.  No one else can give it to me.

So what's my goals for Sexuary 2014, the year of 'me'?  I don't know to be honest.  I've spent a lot of time on 'me' over the years, so I'll have to dig deep to come up with something. I've still got a week left, so I'm sure I'll figure out something, but it's going to be a bit of a struggle..after all when you talk about 'me' you have to be honest with yourself or you're just blowing smoke up everyone's (and your own) ass.  Which might be ok if that's your kink, but thinking for Sexuary it's not exactly what was intended.  Stay tuned ...answers to come.

Dane

101 Kinky Ideas

I was working on a project and when I did I came across this website, 101 Ultra Kinky Ideas.  Ok, in my realm of kinky it's really pretty mild, but I wanted to share it with you because of it mildness of kink.  Some of you want to have a bad side, but you either don't know how to get started, afraid to get started or just don't want to go to deep.  This site has 101 relatively 'mild' kinky things you and your partner can do.  OK, some of them are a bit more kinky than others, but some of them even the most novice of kinksters can handle.

http://bites-and-bruises.tumblr.com/post/1001496573/101-ultra-kinky-ideas

Sexuray is only a bit more than a month away.  Because of family health issues it definitely will not be a month of hot steamy monkey sex for Jackie and I.  We've not figured out exactly what we'll be doing, but it will be something.  Are you looking forward to Sexuary?  Are you planning on doing SOMETHING for Sexuary?

For those new to this blog it was started from a Sexuary challenge posted on www.welcometomybrain.net to make some difference in your sex life during the month of February, affectionately known as "Sexuary".  If you have monthly sex, then a second or third time that month might be your Sexuary.  If you're a 3 time a weeker, then maybe it's going out of your way to bring in some new excitement to the bedroom.  Maybe your partner has had some desires and you've always been to hesitant to try them, maybe Sexuary is your time to overcome your anxiety and give it a try.

So give it a try, go through that list.  If I counted right Jackie and I have done 60 of the things on the list, so we still have 41 more to go. Always more joy to come in the bedroom...or where ever else you might want to try it.

Dane